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November 30, 2020 by BHP Leave a Comment

Why do ex-boarders find intimate relationships difficult?

This is a question I often ask couples who come to see me for couples therapy. Most cannot answer the question beyond the superficial. However, it is an important question to ponder: relationships are not easy for the most well-adjusted of us and so there has to be a fundamental reason why we (generally) choose to pair bond (be in a committed intimate and romantic relationship with one other person).

I believe that we choose to pair bond as on an unconscious level it is the closest that we can come as adult humans to replicating the ideal) experience of childhood where we had a parent who was there for us, who would listen to us and who, most importantly, would help us make sense of our feelings so that we knew we were not alone. This is essentially what strong functional couples do – they listen to each other and try and work out what feeling their partner is trying to convey to them. The general term for this is empathy.

I therefore believe that this explains what we all want and why we all go into relationships. And also why so many of us keep on trying to find ‘the right person’ even after so many disappointments.

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What happens to boarders?
Ex-boarders also harbour hope of a good relationship, however, may be at odds in identifying one. The attachment damage they have sustained and the abandonment (couched in privilege) that they have experienced, leaves them unconsciously yearning for that idealised mother who will be there unconditionally for them. Of course, what they eventually find in any relationship with another adult is that they are not in an unconditional relationship (no such thing exists) and then they withdraw to avoid being hurt or disappointed.

What does it look like?
We are all different and so are ex-boarders, however, many have some traits in common which I shall list:

Ex-boarders tend to-

  • Withdraw emotionally from relationships in order to keep themselves safe and default to their indolence survival strategy;
  • Struggle to make sense of what their emotions are telling them and lack the ability to navigate them without becoming overwhelmed: ex-boarders are good under pressure until they are not;
  • Have an over-reliance on logic and rationality to make sense of the world – this does not work when confronted with a partner who is trying to share their emotions;
  • Regulate (read manage) their emotions by controlling their external world – exercise, career success, sex, alcohol, drugs etc. Some may be less harmful than others but all show an inanity to be in contact with their inner world;
  • Live a pseudo-life where they can never really allow themselves to feel alive as that can only happen through bringing themselves fully into relationships and navigating their needs through communicating boundaries.

What can be done?
The effects that the abandonment a child suffers from being sent to boarding school can be enormously significant. Often ex-boarders will only resent for therapy when they have ‘hit a wall’ in some way.

Psychotherapy can help and indeed is the only way to remap the brain and help ex-boarders come to life. As the damage is relational, the only remedy is a therapeutic relationship where the cut-off feelings of loss, abandonment and emptiness can be retrieved and experienced in the safety of a psychotherapeutic frame.

 

The term ‘Boarding School Syndrome’ was coined by Jungian analyst Professor Joy Schaverian around a decade ago. Since then, it has gained significant traction as a model for explaining the experiences and symptoms of adults who were sent away to boarding school as children.  Please refer to Mark’s previous blog.

 

To enquire about psychotherapy sessions with Mark Vahrmeyer, please contact him here, or to view our full clinical team, please click here.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further ready by Mark Vahrmeyer –

Why ‘Cancel Culture’ is about the inability to tolerate difference

The Phenomenon of ‘Manifesting – The Law of Attraction’ and the inability to tolerate reality

Why does the difference between counselling and psychotherapy matter?

Love in the time of Covid

Why am I feeling more anxious with Covid-19?

Coronavirus Lock-Down – Physical Health Vs Mental Health

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Filed Under: Attachment, Mark Vahrmeyer, Relationships, Sexuality Tagged With: boarding school syndrome, relationship, Relationship Counselling, Relationships

November 23, 2020 by BHP Leave a Comment

Understanding Sexual Fantasy

The exploration of sexual preference and fantasy in therapy can be a portal to our inner psychological landscape. Unlocking the unconscious logic of sexual fantasy is one way of casting  a light on our internal world and of understanding the emotional and psychological difficulties that may have prompted us to seek therapy in the first instance.

Our sexual scripts are formed in infancy, long before the onset of mature sexual desire. Our early attachment experiences and the familial and cultural context into which we are born inform the psychological maps and templates for being (in the world) to which we both consciously and unconsciously refer as we develop and grow. We are evolutionarily wired and sensitively attuned to the moods and feeling states of our caregivers absorbing them all through a process of psychological osmosis.

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The conflict of growing up

Whilst our lust and capacity for pleasure (according to the Freudian account) are instinctual, the road to pleasure is more often than not a complicated one. We are likely to experience myriad obstacles along the way (many that will later inform our sexual fantasies) guilt, shame, fear, rejection may all stand in the way of our experience of pleasure. We all (consciously or otherwise) feel guilty about something. Life is fraught with conflict – and from the get go. The conflict (for example) between our attachment to our families and to the developmental imperative to grow up, individuate and leave them is fraught with guilt and worry. We bring these unresolved and largely unconscious conflicts into our erotic lives.

The creativity of fantasy

The child of a depressed parent may grow up with a powerful sensitivity to and identification with the sadness of others. It may be hard for such an individual to fully connect to their own aliveness and vitality as sexual excitement is fundamentally incompatible with depression. In the imaginative realm of fantasy such an individual may be released from the burden of caring by populating their fantasies with dynamic carefree people, aroused, excited and turned on. It is not hard to understand, in this scenario, that when everyone is having a great time (and no one is depressed)  the fantasy serves as a creative permission to connect, without guilt or shame to one’s own desire.

An antidote to trauma

Many sexual fantasies can seem puzzling and hard to understand. One person’s turn on is another’s turn off after all. Arousal for some may come through being tied up and whipped, another’s from phone sex, group sex, sex with a stranger(s), etc, etc. All are plots of desire, many are attempts to draw on and transform past trauma. When someone is cruel or aggressive  in their sexual fantasy or practice it is not because they are inherently sadistic but rather that they are trying to solve a problem. It may be useful and illuminating to consider and understand why the normal pursuit of pleasure may require a particular imaginative scenario in order to be safely experienced.

Empathy and ruthlessness are important aspects of a healthy sexual relationship. Too much empathy (for the other) may be a dampener to our own desire and too much ruthlessness may render sex mechanical and devoid of emotion. Sexual fantasies can be attempts to counteract or transform beliefs and feelings that may interfere with sexual arousal and can provide an elegant ( if not always politically correct) solution to the problems of ruthlessness , guilt and shame.

When we  understand our sexuality we understand ourselves.

 

Gerry Gilmartin is an accredited, registered and experienced psychotherapeutic counsellor. She currently works with individuals (young people/adults) and couples in private practice. Gerry is available at our Brighton and Hove Practice.

 

Further reading by Gerry Gilmartin

Fear and hope in the time of Covid

Relationships, networks and connections

Paying attention to stress

Why does empathy matter?

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Filed Under: Gerry Gilmartin, Relationships, Sexuality Tagged With: Relationships, sexuality, Trauma

October 5, 2020 by BHP Leave a Comment

What is Andropause and what happens to men when their testosterone levels decline?

Schools will soon have menopause on the curriculum. Largely due to the efforts of psychotherapist Diane Danzebrink and her #MakeMenopauseMatter campaign. In 2019 Education Secretary Damian Hinds confirmed menopause will
become part of the Sex and Relationships curriculum for teenagers in the UK in Autumn 2020 alongside periods and pregnancy.

With the recognition that menopause needs to be better understood in the broader context of sex and relationships perhaps now we can begin to talk about men’s experience of changes in their hormones. Testosterone is the main sex
hormone (androgen) in men and the symptoms that men can experience as a result of reduced testosterone are called andropause. The hormone testosterone plays a role in the production of sperm, in the drive to have sex, in building muscle and bone mass, in the way fat is deposited around the body, in the facial and body hair patterns found in males and their deeper voices.

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Men will experience hormonal changes as they age, levels of testosterone will start to decline from around 30 at approximately 10% every decade. It is important to note that testosterone reduction can also be affected by other
factors such as injury, cancer treatments, medication and chronic conditions including diabetes, obesity, kidney and liver disease. Symptoms include a lower sex drive, loss of body muscle and an increase in body fat, decrease in bone
density, fatigue, insomnia and difficulty attaining and maintaining erections*.

From research by the Centre for Men’s Health Clinic in Manchester, looking at men over 50 in the UK, Dr Malcolm Carruthers says: “Of the ten thousand men surveyed actually 80 per cent had moderate or high levels of symptoms suggesting they had testosterone deficiency. This shows that its not the rare condition that some doctors claim but actually its very common and almost totally untreated.”

Symptoms described by two patients attending the clinic and suffering from low testosterone, defined as Testosterone Deficiency Syndrome, share features with women’s accounts of menopause.

“Well I was 55 or there abouts and I was getting perspiration in my shirt and was getting really wet, I’m talking serious perspiration, tiredness and I had a lot of muscle aches particularly in my legs”.

“I was a fishing skipper for 23 years and was the type of person that woke up in the morning and rolled out of bed and was on the job, something to do” …  Then when I reached the age of 55 I began to feel that I was flagging and I got all sorts of strange to me symptoms, aches, pains, horrendous sweats and uncontrollable temper.”

What about the mental and emotional aspects of andropause? We need to acknowledge and better understand andropause and the impact on men and their lives and relationships. Symptoms of andropause include mood swings,
irritability, low-self esteem, memory and concentration problems and depression. These are familiar menopausal symptoms for women, however it may be harder for men to acknowledge these symptoms and to ask for help
because they are associated with female menopause.

 

Angela Rogers is an Integrative Psychotherapeutic counsellor working with individuals and couples in Hove.

 

Further reading by Angela Rogers –

Viagra for women? Medical treatment for women’s sexual problems focuses on the brain rather than the genitals

New Year’s Resolutions – Why change might be so difficult?

Viagra: Some ups and downs of the little blue pill

The Menopause – Women of a Certain Age

 

References –
Diane Danzebrink
https://twitter.com/hashtag/makemenopause

Centre for Men’s Health Clinic
Associated Press Television 11.3.2011
https://youtu.be/33aCzR4U9l4

*See an earlier blog about men’s use of Viagra here.

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Filed Under: Ageing, Angela Rogers, Relationships, Sexuality Tagged With: men's issues, Menopause, sexuality

July 20, 2020 by Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy Leave a Comment

What is it like being in a Psychotherapy Group? Case study – Joe

In my experience, when exploring joining a therapy group, people often ask what it will be like. I thought it might be helpful to write a fictional narrative to give a flavour of the therapeutic experience of being in a group. This ‘case’ is not based on a real individual although some of the conflicts and difficulties will undoubtedly feel familiar to many. To keep this blog as a short read, I have simplified the details, and have focussed on just one aspect of a person’s history, difficulties, and group experience.

Joe

Joe would always say his childhood was fine. Nothing bad or traumatic happened. No real problems. As an adult, however, Joe felt increasingly alienated in his life and relationships.  In particular, he had struggled to maintain long-term relationships, which was causing him pain, disappointment and worry about the future. 

After his last relationship ended in a familiar way, Joe came into therapy with a sense of loneliness and emptiness. Through discussing this with the therapist, Joe came to feel that a group might be helpful for his difficulties.

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Early stages

Once in the group, Joe found that by listening to the way others talked about their experiences, and hearing their feedback to his own, he could start to formulate some different perspectives on himself. 

Particularly new for Joe, was an insight into the ways he had felt neglected as a child. Joe began to connect old memories and recall new ones which gave a picture of a lonely child overlooked by two busy and distracted parents. It was a shock to recall this vulnerable and neglected younger self.

Joe was immediately struck by the supportive and open atmosphere in the group. At first, he found the curiosity and empathy that other group members showed towards him strange. Over time the other members pointed out how often he dismissed his emotional experiences, and the ways that he avoided being taken care of in the group.  Joe realised this was the first time in his life where he felt his emotional needs might be important. 

New Insights

Accepting that his early experiences might have been difficult and impactful was the first step for Joe. He began to realise how he had developed an emotional independence as a means of survival and had therefore set out to deny the needy part of himself. Keeping his needs at bay also required creating a distance between himself and others. Joe was desperately fearful of this defensive system falling apart, and of being thrown back into the loneliness of his childhood. 

A few months in to being in the group, Joe had an important insight that his relationships often began to fall apart around the same time that he started to feel an emotional commitment. Joe’s break-through was heightened by being able to link this to what he was discovering about himself and the feedback he was getting about the way he pushed people away in the group.

As time went on, Joe was able to open-up more in the group. He explored the patterns of relationships failing and was also able to learn from others who also reflected on their own historical and current relationship struggles, as well as developments and successes. 

Making External Changes

After about 18 months Joe was feeling settled in the group. He had started a new relationship, and with the support of the group was more conscious of what was getting stirred up in him and mindful of his impulses to escape the intimacy this person offered him. 

Crisis

The group had helped Joe get in touch with the painful experiences of his childhood that he had tried to deny and avoid. He found himself increasingly in touch with emotional needs that he had not had sufficiently met as a child. This made it harder to tolerate the times in the group where he felt unheard or overlooked. The more Joe opened himself up to his need, the more he felt wounded and frustrated when it was not met. 

Joe announced very suddenly that he was going to leave the group. The group members questioned the timing of this decision and Joe agreed to give it more time and thought.

The group and therapist helped Joe to think about the parallels with the times in his life where he tended to finish a relationship just as it was beginning to be. Joe realised that the frustration and upset he had been feeling in the group was bound up with intimacy. He started to see that leaving at this point was another way of avoiding the frustrations of having intimate relationships. Being able to make a link between what was happening to him in the group and his pattern of relationships helped Joe to properly understand himself on a profound and deeper level. 

3 years on, Joe is still in the group. Last week the other members and therapist were delighted when he told them he and his partner have decided to get married. 

Discussion

Joe benefitted enormously from the therapy group from the outset and had been able to make significant progress and changes in his life, However it was when his ‘problem’ manifested in such a live way in the group that something was able to transform on a deeper level. Joe’s frustration with the group was a turning point in his therapy as he had to confront pain reminiscent of his childhood and see how his habitual strategies of ‘ending’ relationships was a way of avoiding the reality of intimacy. 

Claire Barnes is an experienced UKCP registered psychotherapist and group analyst offering psychodynamic counselling and psychotherapy to individuals and groups at our Hove practice.

 

Further reading by Claire Barnes

Silences in Therapy

Sibling Rivalry – Part 1

Sibling Rivalry – Park 2

What is loneliness?

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Filed Under: Claire Barnes, Groups, Relationships, Sexuality Tagged With: group psychotherapy, group therapy, support groups

May 11, 2020 by Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy Leave a Comment

Love in the time of Covid

I admit the shameless plagiarising of the title of Gabriel Garcia Marquez’ – ‘Love in the Time of Cholera’ as it fits as a Segway into considering the tresses and strains of both finding love, and holding onto in, in the current pandemic. 

The statistics

Disturbing statistics are emerging of surging rates of domestic violence, sadly predominantly perpetrated by men upon women, exacerbated by the circumstances brought about by the ‘lock-down’. A surge of somewhere between 25% and 35% in the rates of reported domestic violence hide all that goes unreported. 

Alongside the extremes of domestic violence lie other statistics such as the reality that many couples have suddenly been catapulted from spending a couple of hours per day together, to inhabiting the same space (indoors and out) for the entire of the day. A young couples dream has become many seasoned couples challenge (and for some a nightmare). 

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On finding love 

The old rules of dating have gone through a revolution in recent years from what dating constitutes, through whom we date (gender fluidity) into how we date revolutionised by the internet. 

However, suddenly, the seemingly endless supply of opportunities to physically meet others has dried up with us being left with all the tools and little of the substance. We can swipe left or right, however, we cannot meet those we like (unless we risk social judgement and our own physical health – both of which may paradoxically make the whole encounter that much more exciting). 

Referring to statistics, there has been a surge in pornography use as those who are isolating alone seek out some virtual simulation and those isolating with partners seek out some sense of novelty. Throw into the mix the likely enduring requirements for ‘social distancing’ and it raises questions around what dating may look like going forward? 

On keeping love 

Coping with ‘lock-down’ can be challenging on any relationship whether new or old, robust or fractured. That is because relationships all rely on certain key ingredients that make relating possible – all of which have been outwardly challenged during lock-down.

Space 

It is abundantly obvious that for all of us, our physical worlds have shrunk down. Socialising, leisure trips and the distractions of shopping have all been taken away. And many of us find ourselves cooped up for 24 hours per day (bar the ubiquitous exercise sorle) with our partners. 

Negotiating physical space is always a part of a healthy relationship involving discussion, negotiation and compromise. The world of Covid lock-down has amplified this and with it the requirement to communicate effectively around personal space. In lieu of healthy communication, some couples find themselves acting out and reacting to what they perceive as intrusions by the partner, when their partner is probably trying to carve our a little space for themselves too. 

Boundaries 

Boundaries are similar to space though in this context I shall be referring to them as the management of internal space – emotional closeness and distance. In any relationship, no matter how healthy, it is very unlikely that the two protagonists (or more if you are polyamorous), have the same needs for emotional intimacy. This is inherently frustrating. More so now than ever, but remember, it is also a simple truth of being in an adult relationship with another adult (rather than regressing to the fantasy of a union between mother and infant). 

Boundaries need to be explicitly named and negotiated and naming how one is feeling (taking turns to do so) is a key foundation in managing boundaries: if we know what we are feeling then we can communicate it. 

Difference 

The two former headings bring me neatly onto the concept of difference. One of my pet hates is when couples refer to their partner as ‘my other half’ or some iteration of this fantasy merger. 

Being in an adult relationship with another adult means having to tolerate reality – the reality that our partner is different to us and therefore has different views, thoughts and feelings to us, irrespective of how odd we may find them. 

When tensions are heightened (cue the Covid lock-down), humans can find difference threatening and will seek out consensus and similarity. This happens of a national scale where many differences are (temporarily) put aside for the common good and presents itself in relationships too. The problem is – it is an illusion. 

Sure, we can all agree to put aside differences in challenging times in order to achieve a goal, however the differences remain. And in lock-down, those differences are far less likely to be ‘life or death’ issues between couples and far more likely to be around an opinion about a film, a meal, or some other triviality that when mixed with anxiety, becomes evidence that just perhaps our partner is rather mad and not the right person for us to continue our journey through life with in the post Covid landscape. 

Couple who genuinely fare well in daily life in terms of negotiating and compromising; in observing difference no mater how hard it is – the cornerstone of empathy – will fare better in this crisis. 

The third table leg 

We all know that in order to build a stable table a minimum of three legs is required: two leads to instability. The same goes for relationships – not that we need a third person in the relationship – just the spectre of a third. Let me explain: 

Relationships are a complex balance of wanting to be one with our partner and suffering the frustration of knowing that that cannot happen. To get too close kills the relationship as the couple can no longer see each other and the relationship becomes a merger – a fantasy re- enactment of the womb experience. Too distant an intimacy and connection is not possible – this the the couple dance. 

For many couples their partners interaction with the outside world makes them interesting and enables each to see the other as a separate person who has a life outside of the relationship. Couple work, play and socialise, at least in part, separately. And this is the way it has always been and remains in tribal communities such as, for example the Aboriginal communities of Australia where ‘men’s business’ and women’s business’ was culturally and ceremonially embedded so observe difference. 

Under Covid, many of us have lost jobs, are being paid to stay at home or are trying to work from a co-living space with our partner – we no longer have to wonder about the ‘mysteries’ of men’s and women’s business as we are exposed to it 24 hours a day. The third table leg has become decidedly wobbly. 

On kindness 

Just like ‘Love in the Time of Cholera’ is not actually about cholera, nor are the current relationship challenges really about Covid and the lock-down. They are about who we are and how we navigate adult to adult relationships sacrificing the certainly or a pseudo infant- adult relationship for one that is real and therefore difficult and frustrating. Marquez’ book is ultimately about the reality of relationships in all the glory and pain and that is what is being brought to the forefront in this crisis for many couples. Being kind to each other is harder than it sounds when so much of what we rely on externally to manage our relationships vanishes in a lock-down.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further reading by Mark Vahrmeyer –

Coronavirus Lock-Down – Physical Health vs Mental Health

Why psychotherapy sessions should end on time

Coronavirus Induced Mental Health Issues

Coronavirus (Covid-19) Counselling

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Filed Under: Mark Vahrmeyer, Relationships, Sexuality, Society Tagged With: couples therapy, Relationship Counselling, Relationships

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COVID-19 (CORONAVIRUS) Important Notice

We would like to reassure all our clients that Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy is operating as normal despite the current situation.

Our working practices have fully incorporated online therapy in addition to a re-opening of our Hove and Lewes practices for face-to-face psychotherapy in accordance with Government guidelines and advice on safe practice and social distancing.