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Why ‘Cancel Culture’ is about the inability to tolerate difference

What is Cancel Culture?

This seemingly new trend is one of promoting the ‘cancellation’ of people, brands or television shows as a result of what some (the cancellers) perceive to be some form of offensive comment, remark, view or behaviour. It has surged on social media with various derogatory hashtags, notably #RIP.

A recent high profile ‘celebrity’ who has been on the receiving end of social media trends to have her cancelled is J.K. Rowling for her, views on transgender issues that some find offensive.

Is it that new?

The term may be new and the platforms used may serve to whip up a storm of support against those who some wish to have cancelled, however the concept is by no means new at all. Cancel culture is essentially a form of social banishment whereby in traditional tribal communities one of the most severe punishments would be the banishment from the tribe: to be cast out.

To be cast out of ones tribe would mean more than social death; if not literal death through being vulnerable to attack from predators and other tribes, banishment most certainly meant the death of the sense of belonging, which in psychological terms, could potentially instigate a psychic collapse (going mad).

However, whilst this may seem primitive, historical and anthropological evidence shows that it would be a punishment of last resort and would be handed down by the elders of the tribe – in other words, there would be some form of judicial process in place that sanctioned the banishment.

This is where cancel culture differs profoundly from tribal banishment or ‘being cast out’. It is not a decree from wise elders or some sort of judiciary; it is generally used as an attack against the views, opinions or behaviours of others that some disagree with.

Why does it matter?

Put simply, it matters because there seems to be an ever decreasing array of opinions and voices allowed and cancel culture is an immature way of trying to ‘kill off’ anybody holding views or opinions that may not be comfortable for others to hear.

Feeling offended and causing offence

There is a difference between a person feeling upset or even offended by another’s views and with another trying to purposely hurt a person or group of people. The former is what we may experience when we encounter others and are confronted by a different perspective. The latter is when we encounter sadism.

Sadism is unacceptable and should not be tolerated, however the mark of being an adult is the capacity to tolerate a different perspective and a different mind. Even if we may feel offended.

On mergers and separation

Although separate from its mother, an infant, when born, cannot differentiate between their mother and themselves. In essence they believe that their mother is an extension of them. Of course, in reality, the mother in question is very much as separate entity, at least physically, and thus will eventually fail to meet the needs of her infant. This is extremely frustrating for the infant in question and the mind of the infant concocts an ingenious defence against the pain of separation – a good and a bad mother is created: the infant imagines it is the good mother who meets all their needs and the bad mother who frustrates them. It is a primitive psychological defence called splitting.

Infants split off the bad until through ‘good enough’ parenting they eventually integrate the two mothers and tolerate reality: mother is not part of them and frustrates them as she has a different mind and a different set of needs. However, mostly, she seems to meet their needs so on life goes and importantly, on psychological maturation goes. The child is on the path from mergers to a world where they can be in separate relationships with others and tolerate a different mind.

Why cancel culture is simply splitting by another name

To be unable to contain ones feelings when confronted by a different perspective and thus a different mind shows a lack of psychological maturity. The world is split into ‘good and ‘bad’ like in a child’s fairy tale. Bad must be killed off so good can live happily ever after. This is not how the real world works; it is how cancel culture works.

How does cancel culture relate to psychotherapy?

In essence, psychotherapy is about outgrowing cancel culture. It is about learning to be in a relationship where difference can be tolerated and acknowledged, without this needing to be threatening. For some this means they must learn for the first time to bring their needs ‘into the mix’ – something that can feel really confronting and may bring on fears of rejection and abandonment. For others it may mean the opposite which is to be able to cope with the separateness of their psychotherapist and tolerate this without throwing away ‘all the good’ – without ‘cancelling’ them, if you like.

Being an adult means tolerating the frustrations of the real world and the frustrations of the others who make up the real world. However, if this can be tolerated then real relationships are possible and people can locate substance and meaning thus moving them out of a fear/threat pattern into adult relating patterns.

If you would like to work on your own intolerances and relationships, get in touch with us to discuss whether psychotherapy may be appropriate for you.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further reading by Mark Vahrmeyer

Why does the difference between counselling and psychotherapy matter?

Love in the time of Covid

Why am I feeling more anxious with Covid-19?

Coronavirus Lock-Down – Physical Health Vs Mental Health

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The Phenomenon of ‘Manifesting – The Law of Attraction’ and the inability to tolerate reality

What is ‘Manifesting’ and The Law of Attraction?

Recently a client, somewhat younger than me, described a phenomenon they called “Manifesting”. They felt excited and disappointed in themselves in equal measure that they seemed to be failing in using this ‘secret’ method of working with ‘the universe’ to bring them whatever their heart desired.

Curious, I investigated.

Manifesting is a verb used to describe the active process of using positive thoughts, and a degree of self-hypnosis, to draw ‘good things’ to oneself. Based on the many Youtube videos on this topic, these good things seem to be consumer products or monetary wealth, rather than contentment and tolerance, but then the latter two are really not as enticing as ones own private island.

Manifesting is not new and nor is the concept original. It seems to have been re-hashed in a 2006 ‘documentary’ and book entitled ‘The Secret’ which explains the mystical process of using the ‘Law of Attraction’ to get what you want in life. What a great concept – if only it were true.

Fate and Destiny
I have previously written about the concepts of fate and destiny and how I do not believe that any idea of fate has a place in psychotherapy – or indeed in the outcome of psychotherapy, which is in essentially becoming an adult who can tolerate reality.

To recap, the concept of fate posits that there is some sort of external force, entity or deity that decides what happens to us. This can be very unhelpful in the therapeutic process as clients can often use the idea of fate to reinforce that what is happening (or not) to them is simply how things are supposed to be.

Destiny, though not a word I personally favour, can be translated to being thought of as taking some degree of ownership of one’s life whilst remaining firmly rooted in reality. Therefore it is possible for most free people to experience a change in their lives, or perception of their lives, whist acknowledging their reality.

Destiny and death
Some years back I spent four years working on the front lines of death – as a psychotherapist in the field of palliative care. Whilst the usual issues around meaning, relationships and mental health problems presented themselves, they were all within the context of death and dying: I worked with patients who had terminal illnesses, were actively dying or with their bereaved relatives. It certainly redefines the concept of ‘psychotherapy’ when sitting beside the bedside of a patient who has hours to live and is engaging with you through a cocktail of opiates!

Despite the confronting nature of death and dying – the patients’ ‘fate’ was sealed – nonetheless, many of the people I worked with were able to find purpose and meaning in their predicament and to mourn losses not perviously addressed. They were engaged in changing their destiny.

Magical thinking
We can all, at times, make use of magical thinking. It can be a way of assuaging anxiety and giving us an illusion of being in control. The practice is as old as human beings and embedded in language such as in the saying ‘touch wood’ or in the belief that walking under ladders brings bad luck. Human beings are symbolic creatures who make the unreal real. This is perhaps how we cope with our knowledge of finitude – death. However, we also confuse the symbolic with the real.

Whilst touching wood and avoiding ladders is relatively harmless, subscribing wholeheartedly to fantasies that there is some ‘secret’ method or means of ‘manifesting’ objects into ones life is dangerous and deluded. In psychological terms it is a way of avoiding growing up and being born. A way of believing that the world can be just how we want it if only we imagine it hard enough – a sort of womb, in essence.

The power of magic
The reality of being in weekly or more frequent psychotherapy is that it is not very magical at all.  In fact, it is the opposite. Psychotherapy generally takes place in a fairly ordinary consulting room (or online), you see the same face week after week and often find yourself going over the same ground. Clearly promises of Ferraris and private islands are far more enticing. However, the consistency and regularity, along with having someone there who holds us in mind and helps us think can be life changing. If we are thought about, just perhaps we can learn to think our own
thoughts about ourselves rather than follow a script on who we are. If we are not alone then we can learn to bear reality, however hard that may seem.

Psychotherapy does not promise magic. It is, in fact, the opposite in that often our job as psychotherapists is to help clients and patients lift the veils of illusion and see life and their history for what it was – only then can the mourning begin. And it is only through mourning that eventually desire can emerge – a sense of self and a sense of what that self wants.

Desire
When desire emerges it is rarely if ever about Ferraris or private islands. It is not about consumer products period. It is about a deeper recognition of what will bring contentment and peace in the context of the realities in which that person lives. And that can be achieved even on a death-bed.

Of course, as a final blow, unlike manifesting, psychotherapy also has science on its side. And a long studied evidence base. It may not get the Youtube hits but then real life was never to be found in movies.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further reading by Mark Vahrmeyer

Why does the difference between counselling and psychotherapy matter?

Love in the time of Covid

Why am I feeling more anxious with Covid-19?

Coronavirus Lock-Down – Physical Health Vs Mental Health

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Why does the difference between counselling and psychotherapy matter?

What a difference a year makes. For all of us the world is an inconceivably different place to a year ago. Not only are we all living with greater uncertainty, we have all had to enormously adapt to living, socialising, relating working, and not least, having therapy in a different way.

Almost exactly a year ago I wrote a blog on entitled ‘The Difference Between Counselling and Psychotherapy’, which has received some traction. More recently, the age old question pertaining to the difference between these to related disciplines has come bursting forth through a collaborative project SCoPEd project which seeks to set out training requirements and practice standards for counselling and psychotherapy. This project is receiving a lot of attention
(accompanied by fierce criticism) by many in the ‘talking therapies’ field. I have no wish to get drawn into the intricacies and politics of the actual project but do firmly believe that from a client’s perspective, standardisation of training requirements and robust practice standards that differ between counsellors and psychotherapists can only be a good thing. More so, I believe that they are essential.

Many of my clients come to be after trying some form of ‘talk therapy’ which may or may not have been helpful. Many come because they are unclear about why they don’t feel better and have ‘stumbled’ across me and my practice via a search engine. Few really understand that there is a difference between counselling and psychotherapy and few understand what they may need and why that may be a psychotherapist.

The fact few understand this has nothing to do with the fact that there is a fundamental difference and put simply, the more I have trained and the more years of experience I have, the more cognisant I have become not only of the differences, but also of how to assess what someone needs and whether they are in fact suitable for therapy.

I have written extensively about the differences between psychotherapy and counselling in my blog a year ago and if you are interested, you can read them here. My blogs are aimed predominantly at lay people who may be considering entering into therapy, rather than at the counselling and psychotherapy community.

Why do clients need to understand the difference between counsellors and psychotherapists?           

At present the distinction (in the minds of many) is blurry. Many counsellors believe the two terms to be interchangeable and are thus aggrieved by any proposed framework that should distinguish between the two disciplines: most counsellors think they are psychotherapist; few psychotherapists consider themselves counsellors.
The distinction matters from a duty of care perspective. Deeper work with clients dealing with complex trauma, personality disturbance and psychiatric disorders requires an in-depth understanding of how to identify these issues and an assessment of our ability to work with such clients and the client’s ability to ‘make use’ of the therapy, their robustness.

Turning clients away

My practice is generally full as my work is long-term, however, when considering taking on a new client I undertake a clinical assessment of their suitability for therapy. I aim to answer the question: ‘can I help this person?’ It may seem counter-intuitive, however, I am far more likely to turn down clients pre- or post-assessment now than when I first started out as a counsellor.

Why? Because I now know what I do not know and where my limitations lie.

A GP will not undertake surgery as they have been trained in general practice. They can however, recognise that a patient needs to see a specialist who can offer an expert opinion and in-depth complex treatment. A GP is invaluable precisely because they are aware of what they do and don’t know and work within their limitations.

This is the ethical responsibility that I believe all counsellors and psychotherapists would carry at the forefront of their minds, however, without training in formulating (our word for diagnosing) how can a clinician know what they don’t know? Herein lies the problem.

Do no harm

The Hyppocratic Oath, subscribed to by medical professionals the world over applies to us too.  In trying to help (rescue, fix, therapise, relate to) a client, unless we are acutely aware of what we are dealing with, we can do more harm than good.

Is there a place for counselling?

Unequivocally yes. Counselling is enormously beneficial and most psychotherapists started their careers as counsellors in some capacity. Counselling is often all a client needs and it can bring about enormous change for many. However, it is not appropriate for more complex or serious relational or personality disturbances.

In turning clients way it is not solely or even frequently because their requirements lie beyond my abilities; I often suggest to prospective clients that counselling may be more appropriate for them, especially if they have no prior experience of ‘talking therapy’ and are wanting to work-through a time limited issue.

And beyond psychotherapy?

The clients I do turn away as their requirements lie either beyond my knowledge base or holding capacity, I do so from a position of ‘doing no harm’ and making an often tough ethical decision. It may be that that person requires psychiatric support but it may also be that their level of disturbance is best treated by a multi-disciplinary team. And then there is, of course, psychoanalysis.

Inaccessible for many – sadly as Freud saw Analysis as being something that should be accessible for the general population – provides something that psychotherapy cannot: the ability and framework within which to work at depth with powerful regression.

To summarise, difference simply must be acknowledged and accepted between the professions for the safety and well-being of clients and patients. To do otherwise is plain hubris.

To enquire about psychotherapy sessions with Mark Vahrmeyer, please contact him here, or to view our full clinical team, please click here.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further reading by Mark Vahrmeyer

Love in the time of Covid

Why am I feeling more anxious with Covid-19?

Coronavirus Lock-Down – Physical Health Vs Mental Health

Why psychotherapy sessions should end on time

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Love in the time of Covid

I admit the shameless plagiarising of the title of Gabriel Garcia Marquez’ – ‘Love in the Time of Cholera’ as it fits as a Segway into considering the tresses and strains of both finding love, and holding onto in, in the current pandemic. 

The statistics

Disturbing statistics are emerging of surging rates of domestic violence, sadly predominantly perpetrated by men upon women, exacerbated by the circumstances brought about by the ‘lock-down’. A surge of somewhere between 25% and 35% in the rates of reported domestic violence hide all that goes unreported. 

Alongside the extremes of domestic violence lie other statistics such as the reality that many couples have suddenly been catapulted from spending a couple of hours per day together, to inhabiting the same space (indoors and out) for the entire of the day. A young couples dream has become many seasoned couples challenge (and for some a nightmare). 

On finding love 

The old rules of dating have gone through a revolution in recent years from what dating constitutes, through whom we date (gender fluidity) into how we date revolutionised by the internet. 

However, suddenly, the seemingly endless supply of opportunities to physically meet others has dried up with us being left with all the tools and little of the substance. We can swipe left or right, however, we cannot meet those we like (unless we risk social judgement and our own physical health – both of which may paradoxically make the whole encounter that much more exciting). 

Referring to statistics, there has been a surge in pornography use as those who are isolating alone seek out some virtual simulation and those isolating with partners seek out some sense of novelty. Throw into the mix the likely enduring requirements for ‘social distancing’ and it raises questions around what dating may look like going forward? 

On keeping love 

Coping with ‘lock-down’ can be challenging on any relationship whether new or old, robust or fractured. That is because relationships all rely on certain key ingredients that make relating possible – all of which have been outwardly challenged during lock-down.

Space 

It is abundantly obvious that for all of us, our physical worlds have shrunk down. Socialising, leisure trips and the distractions of shopping have all been taken away. And many of us find ourselves cooped up for 24 hours per day (bar the ubiquitous exercise sorle) with our partners. 

Negotiating physical space is always a part of a healthy relationship involving discussion, negotiation and compromise. The world of Covid lock-down has amplified this and with it the requirement to communicate effectively around personal space. In lieu of healthy communication, some couples find themselves acting out and reacting to what they perceive as intrusions by the partner, when their partner is probably trying to carve our a little space for themselves too. 

Boundaries 

Boundaries are similar to space though in this context I shall be referring to them as the management of internal space – emotional closeness and distance. In any relationship, no matter how healthy, it is very unlikely that the two protagonists (or more if you are polyamorous), have the same needs for emotional intimacy. This is inherently frustrating. More so now than ever, but remember, it is also a simple truth of being in an adult relationship with another adult (rather than regressing to the fantasy of a union between mother and infant). 

Boundaries need to be explicitly named and negotiated and naming how one is feeling (taking turns to do so) is a key foundation in managing boundaries: if we know what we are feeling then we can communicate it. 

Difference 

The two former headings bring me neatly onto the concept of difference. One of my pet hates is when couples refer to their partner as ‘my other half’ or some iteration of this fantasy merger. 

Being in an adult relationship with another adult means having to tolerate reality – the reality that our partner is different to us and therefore has different views, thoughts and feelings to us, irrespective of how odd we may find them. 

When tensions are heightened (cue the Covid lock-down), humans can find difference threatening and will seek out consensus and similarity. This happens of a national scale where many differences are (temporarily) put aside for the common good and presents itself in relationships too. The problem is – it is an illusion. 

Sure, we can all agree to put aside differences in challenging times in order to achieve a goal, however the differences remain. And in lock-down, those differences are far less likely to be ‘life or death’ issues between couples and far more likely to be around an opinion about a film, a meal, or some other triviality that when mixed with anxiety, becomes evidence that just perhaps our partner is rather mad and not the right person for us to continue our journey through life with in the post Covid landscape. 

Couple who genuinely fare well in daily life in terms of negotiating and compromising; in observing difference no mater how hard it is – the cornerstone of empathy – will fare better in this crisis. 

The third table leg 

We all know that in order to build a stable table a minimum of three legs is required: two leads to instability. The same goes for relationships – not that we need a third person in the relationship – just the spectre of a third. Let me explain: 

Relationships are a complex balance of wanting to be one with our partner and suffering the frustration of knowing that that cannot happen. To get too close kills the relationship as the couple can no longer see each other and the relationship becomes a merger – a fantasy re- enactment of the womb experience. Too distant an intimacy and connection is not possible – this the the couple dance. 

For many couples their partners interaction with the outside world makes them interesting and enables each to see the other as a separate person who has a life outside of the relationship. Couple work, play and socialise, at least in part, separately. And this is the way it has always been and remains in tribal communities such as, for example the Aboriginal communities of Australia where ‘men’s business’ and women’s business’ was culturally and ceremonially embedded so observe difference. 

Under Covid, many of us have lost jobs, are being paid to stay at home or are trying to work from a co-living space with our partner – we no longer have to wonder about the ‘mysteries’ of men’s and women’s business as we are exposed to it 24 hours a day. The third table leg has become decidedly wobbly. 

On kindness 

Just like ‘Love in the Time of Cholera’ is not actually about cholera, nor are the current relationship challenges really about Covid and the lock-down. They are about who we are and how we navigate adult to adult relationships sacrificing the certainly or a pseudo infant- adult relationship for one that is real and therefore difficult and frustrating. Marquez’ book is ultimately about the reality of relationships in all the glory and pain and that is what is being brought to the forefront in this crisis for many couples. Being kind to each other is harder than it sounds when so much of what we rely on externally to manage our relationships vanishes in a lock-down.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further reading by Mark Vahrmeyer –

Coronavirus Lock-Down – Physical Health vs Mental Health

Why psychotherapy sessions should end on time

Coronavirus Induced Mental Health Issues

Coronavirus (Covid-19) Counselling

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Why am I feeling more anxiety with Covid-19?

During the last 100 days, all of our lives, across the globe, have been turned upside down. Whilst scientifically overdue and rationally unsurprising, the pandemic has shaken the foundations of our outer, and thus, inner worlds. What we came to see as normal has been curtailed or removed; what we relied on for our own sense of normality has been fractured. 

Is everybody feeling more anxious? 

No, but that does not make those who are wrong or ill. Some people are feeling less anxious as their ‘ordinary’ level of anxiety (which may be quite high) now have an outlet – something tangible to attach to. Think of the example of a soldier who is able to thinking function efficiently in a war zone but who, upon returning home to an ‘ordinary’ environment, struggles to function as they locate threat behind every corner. 

There are also some who have a healthy relationship with their ‘anxious’ selves and are able to recognise the source of their anxiety and to use it whilst holding onto a thinking mind – such folks may feel a broader and deeper range of all their emotions at present but would not describe themselves as ‘more anxious’. This is possible for us all. 

We are all going to die! 

It is a fact – no way round it – we are all going to die. Though probably not from Covid-19. In fact the likelihood of death from Covid-19 is statistically very low. 

I am not interested in getting into the actual mortality rates etc. for Covid as they have little to do with the anxiety I am addressing – suffice to say that Covid is real and each death is a personal tragedy – like deaths always are. 

However, there is more than meets the eye in the sub-heading of this section of my blog which may shed some light on heightened anxiety levels which I shall attempt to explain. 

Let’s start with the premise that human beings, generally, have a strong biological drive to live – like all other mammals. 

Back to Freud 

Freud posited that the majority of our decision making and therefore emotional work remained largely unconscious to us. He was right about this as has been evidenced in neuroscience experiments. 

Freud also suggested that we have a profoundly unconscious fear of death linked to our consciousness of self – we know that we are alive and therefore we also know we must die and this presents a dilemma. 

All anxiety is death anxiety 

Anxiety is not like the other emotions. It is free floating and pervasive. We all must live with anxiety whether it dominates our experience or is just a flicker on the horizon. 

All other emotions are ‘attached’ to something in that we generally know or can work out why we feel a certain way. We generally know what we feel happy or sad for example – and if we don’t the psychotherapy can uncover the reasons. 

Anxiety is different in the sense that it ‘seeks to attach’ to something. So, rather than being anxious about a presentation, a flight, an exam or a date, our anxiety ‘finds’ something in our environment and then attaches to that convincing us that that thing is what is causing our anxiety. 

Of course real things cause anxiety, however, on a profound (ontological) level, all anxiety stems from an unconscious but ubiquitous knowledge that we are going to die. It is therefore death anxiety. 

Covid represents the perfect vehicle to which our anxiety can attach – it kills. Just not very many of us. It is not a Hollywood movie like Independence Day where the enemy will destroy us all unless we mount a global war (and towards an enemy that we can see – and is monster-like). Covid is invisible to us but nonetheless has triggered a profound death anxiety in all of us – we are primed to feel anxious in the face of death as though we are hard-wired. 

What can I do? 

Earlier I mentioned the term ‘a thinking mind’ and this is one I have written about before. Even though are all primed to feel more anxious when reminded of death (check our Terror Management Theory for empirical evidence of this), it does not mean we need to lose our rational minds and succumb to the anxiety and the accompanying acting out. 

Your mind is capable of thinking and scanning for evidence. For example, if you are reading this piece right now, stop breathe and look around you. Look out of a window and notice that in this precise moment, you are not dying. You can use your sense to ground you: 

  • What can I see; 
  • What can I hear; 
  • What can I smell; 
  • What can a taste; 
  • What can I seen – my breath, my heartbeat, tension in my body etc. 

I must buy toilet paper! 

Much has been made of the compulsive need to purchase toilet paper as the pandemic emerged and took hold. And this seem to be a global rather than local phenomenon (though Americans seem to have a compulsive need to purchase firearms – but that adds confirmation to the theory below). 

So why toilet paper? Well, when anxious humans would rather do something rather than just sit there – and what we often need to do is stop and just sit there. Particularly when we are not about to immediately die. 

Toilet paper is intricately linked to a biological need that we would prefer didn’t exist. The need to defecate. The need to defecate links us to nature and to being, at least in a significant part, animal. Being linked to nature and thus being an animal means that we are mortal – something that is unconsciously unbearable for the part of us that is ‘God-like’ and able to project ourselves back into the past or forward into the future. In short, toilet paper became a manic defense against death but ensuring that we had the ability in the face of death to ‘wipe away’ any evidence of our animal nature. 

Briefly returning to the questions of guns and our American friends – I posit that guns are the way Americans take responsibility for avoiding death anxiety – by protecting themselves against the enemy. Perhaps thank Hollywood for this (even though Covid-19 cannot be shot). Oh, and I am fairly sure they also stocked up on toilet paper.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further reading by Mark Vahrmeyer –

Why psychotherapy sessions should end on time

Coronavirus Induced Mental Health Issues

Coronavirus (Covid-19) Counselling

How being ordinary is increasingly extraordinary – On the role of narcissistic defences

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