The name 'Slow Open Group' was adopted to reflect the nature of the psychological process of opening ourselves to our collective experience in our families, culture and social milieu. Slow, because it takes time, Open because people will come and go over time as they do in our lives.The global … [Read more...]
Avoidance in therapy as the axe for the frozen seas between us
In this blog I will briefly discuss avoidant attachment strategies and how what can look like independence is actually a sort of suit of armour designed to protect and hide a locked box of vulnerability and need, preventing mutual dependency and intimacy.The person who has developed the avoidant … [Read more...]
Is it ever too late to start psychotherapy?
Is it too late to consider going into therapy once we reach a certain age? As I walked through the gardens on an early spring morning, this was the question going through my mind. I intended to get down to writing this blog, an unfamiliar task, when I got back to my office.We seem to have heard … [Read more...]
What happens in Group Therapy: Mirroring
In this and other blogs I try and describe and discuss what it is like being in a therapy group. Here, I focus on the phenomenon of mirroring in groups which is an important group analytic concept, process, and experience.Mirroring and Early DevelopmentTo understand why mirroring is … [Read more...]
The Unconscious Mind
How do we bring to mind what is unconscious? Is it important to make this journey? These two questions are central to the therapeutic process of psychological therapy. When we are young we depend on our primary carer’s usually our parents, to hold and contain our emotional needs.In childhood, … [Read more...]
Some existential musings from the sea
“Why do we like the frantic, the unmastered?” Asks Virginia Woolf, in her diaries. This is a question I also return to time and time again as I look out to sea. Feeling the disquiet holds an edge of excitement for me, there is a thrill to its wild and unknown nature.For me there is something … [Read more...]
Intimacy: pillars and obstacles
Our capacity for intimacy as adults is widely understood to be shaped by our early relational experiences. Theorists from diverse orientations emphasise the link between early attachment patterns and subsequent adult love relationships. When our formative experience is one of loving reciprocity with … [Read more...]
As we come out of lockdown, will a number of us be feeling socially anxious?
For the past year we have largely been confined to our homes, a lot of us working from home and only going out for regular exercise. Our social lives have been depleted, we’ve not been able to see friends and family and generally life may have become quite repetitive.As we come out of lockdown … [Read more...]
Unexpressed emotions will never die
Short sharp, to the point and written by Freud. His full quote is ‘Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways’. What does he mean and is he right? With this statement Freud is defining on the pillars of psycho-analysis and psychotherapy - … [Read more...]
Why is Love Island so Popular? And why it’s not for the reasons we think
For those of you that don’t know, Love Island is a British ‘reality television’ concept that has become a global phenomenon. Arguably deriving from the first global reality programme, Big Brother, which launched in 1997 it is the latest incarnation of this genre.The premise is one whereby a … [Read more...]
When Home and Work Merge
The onset of national lockdowns in early 2020 (and subsequent restrictions) have made working from home the ‘new normal’. What was once seen as an ideal for many, free from commuting and office politics, suddenly became an enforced reality for all of us.Our homes, which were previously separate, … [Read more...]
The Problem with Change
When people come into therapy it is usually with the wish or hope for something to change. If not, they want help with adapting or stabilising following a major change.It is a paradox that change is such a constant in our lives. As we age our bodies inevitably change and if nothing else this … [Read more...]
Executive Function (part 2): Ideas for Supporting Thinking Skills Development in Children
Referring back to my previous blog - Children and young people with Executive Functioning Difficulties need us to:Accept that they have gaps and delays in these skills.Learn, by spending time with them and observing, which Executive Function Skills need scaffolding and practice.Support … [Read more...]
Relax: Watching people using their hands
Stuck at home I don’t always want to chat with friends and family or listen to any more news, podcasts or watch TV drama or read a book. Yet I want to be taken out of myself. I want to be elsewhere and with my own thoughts at the same time.Being engaged in an activity that uses our hands is … [Read more...]
What is Transactional Analysis?
Transactional Analysis (TA) is a widely recognised form of modern counselling and psychotherapy, originally conceived by Eric Berne in the 1950’s and which is now used not only in therapy but also in education and organisational training and consultancy.It is a theory of personality, behaviour … [Read more...]
