If you haven’t heard of the phenomenon that is ‘Squid Game’ then you either have not got Netflix, or are asleep. However, for those of you who haven’t, here is an extremely brief synopsis:Squid Game is set in modern day South Korea and is a dystopian nightmare of a game whereby the wealthy and … [Read more...]
What is the Menopause? (part two)
The historian Susan Mattern argues there is no doubt there is some value to naming menopause as a concept. It has provided women with reasons and different perspectives and interventions on what can be sometimes very distressing symptoms. However she points out that modern medicine can have a … [Read more...]
Parental Alienation and the impact on children
Separation or divorce are painful, difficult and time consuming processes and more so where children are involved. Few couples manage to amicably separate and sadly, this applies to couples who have a child or children together too.Although it may seem obvious, my experience is that couples who … [Read more...]
What is the Menopause? (part one)
I found myself being asked ‘what is the menopause?' by a friend’s 13 year old son a few weeks ago. All the women in the room chimed in to answer. It was not surprising to me that he asked, nor was it surprising all the women answered. Interestingly I had no idea about the menopause at his age and I … [Read more...]
Space: The Final Frontier of Manic Defence
As a boy I was fascinated by space travel. I remember being glued to the television set with awe as the Space Shuttle blasted off into space back in the early 80s - I was born after the epic Apollo programme came to an end and was just the right age to appreciate the engineering accomplishments in … [Read more...]
Why there’s nothing as infuriating as Anger Management
Throughout my career as a Psychotherapist, particularly when working with statutory services, I have often been asked to provide, ‘Anger Management’. Now I do understand that some people desperately need help with their anger and that it often has destructive effects on them and their relationships. … [Read more...]
The Passage of Time
Being human means living with the knowledge that we will one day die and that those we love will die too. As mortal beings we are the children of time and none of us are spared its reckoning. Time makes playthings of us all and we are powerless in its passage. A healer it may be but ultimately we do … [Read more...]
I Never Thought My Son Would Watch Pornography
It was a decade ago that was listening to the radio when I heard this line being spoken for the first time by a mother who was describing the time the police came to her house to enquire after certain pornographic material which had been downloaded using the family IP address. She described the … [Read more...]
What makes Psychotherapy Different?
“The Patient who will not suffer pain fails to suffer pleasure.” Wilfred Bion 1970.I’ve been a therapist for over ten years now and one of the things I love about the job is how demanding it is of me to stay awake and stay alive. The training never stops and development is always a work in … [Read more...]
Is that a fact or an opinion?
Now we are all starting to go out more and socialise again, I wanted to acknowledge how we can all experience anxious or self critical thoughts.I have noticed, when meeting up with various girlfriends recently, how we’ve all shared thoughts of feeling slightly anxious about how others are … [Read more...]
Using empathy to re-build connection with children and young people
This last year of global pandemic has been a time of massive disruption to almost everyone. With it has come disconnection in various forms and the challenge of reconnecting at points when restrictions have lifted. Children and young people have faced their own particular challenges with school … [Read more...]
Care for a Dance?
The considerable volume of writing on relationships is littered with metaphors to explore the intricate connections between people. Most frequent might be images of journeys (‘we had come to a crossroads - an obstacle’, ‘it always seems uphill’); of chemistry (‘I felt the spark had gone’; of sport … [Read more...]
Poetry: A space to ponder
How many of us feel we don’t want to be known beyond what we present to the world and are relieved when our presentations are not tested? When we’re not found out.The poem below by the American poet Jane Hirschfield, is an uncomfortable look at our response when we read about the shameful acts … [Read more...]
Name That Tune
How can an old parlour game help us reflect on the way we communicate? Quite a lot it would seem.Many of us will have played the game where we tap out the rhythm of a tune or song and ask our partner to guess the name of the piece. The challenge for the person doing the listening is that they … [Read more...]
Football, psychotherapy and engaging with male clients
I recently read that an English professional football team has a resident psychotherapist. Whilst the connection between clinical psychology and sporting outcomes is well established, having a team psychotherapist is something new. The therapist explained that they’re there to support the players, … [Read more...]
