Women and Anger

Women have a lot to be angry about. Aside from how our current political and social landscape still disadvantages women, all women inherit a long lasting legacy of the oppression and suffrage of their close female ancestors. This legacy is still intensely felt in society today, and the emotional and psychological impact still visible in…

Football, psychotherapy and engaging with male clients

I recently read that an English professional football team has a resident psychotherapist. Whilst the connection between clinical psychology and sporting outcomes is well established, having a team psychotherapist is something new. The therapist explained that they’re there to support the players, coaches and a team of staff through the emotional highs and lows of…

Am I cracking up or is it my hormones? Pre-menstrual Dysphoric Disorder and the importance of tracking symptoms

It is not comfortable being told that you are feeling the way you do because of your hormones. This kind of biological reductionism is not helpful to any gender but the extremely severe symptoms of Pre-menstrual Dysphoric Disorder are completely aligned to the menstrual cycle. They manifest during the week before menstruation and end when…

Viagra for women? Medical treatment for women’s sexual problems focuses on the brain rather than the genitals

The medical definition of sexual dysfunction in women is hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD) that is low or no libido. Like men, women’s desire for sex is effected by all sorts of factors such as relationship issues, bereavement, physical illness and the side effects of medication, job loss or work stress, depression and anxiety, recreational…

Popping a bluey – young men and Viagra

Following on from my earlier blog about the physiological effects of Viagra, in this blog I am going to discuss some of the psychological and social issues that make young men pop a blue pill. There is common notion that young men are constantly getting erections and always up for having sex. Various sources indicate…

Relationships, networks and connections

How many of us are seldom more than an arms length from our mobile phone? Our bags, clothing, even our sports wear is designed with special pockets for its’ safe keeping. For most of us it has infiltrated every sphere of life, a constant companion. Staying connected has never been so easy. Mobiles are for…

Termination and endings in Psychotherapy

We have just celebrated the ending of the year, welcoming in a New Year. It provides a shared / collective opportunity to reflect on the past, think ahead to the future. Likewise, psychotherapy invites us to think about the past, how it contributes to who we are, what is important to us, how the past…

Viagra: Some ups and downs of the little blue pill

The arrival of Viagra (sildenafil citrate) came on the market in 1998 as the first drug to treat impotence. Impotence is the consistent inability among men to achieve and sustain an erection sufficient for sexual intercourse and/or to achieve ejaculation. Like the contraceptive pill in the 1960s it was greeted as a life changer giving…

Is Love a Tameable Force?

Death like birth is a one off life event. We cannot learn through our experience of either to “get it right” next time. Love on the other hand (or the act of ‘falling in love’) is an event amenable to repetition. As such it is also available for re-definition by the forces of culture –…

Emotionally Focused Therapy: For Couples in Distress

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a short-term evidence-backed therapy with a high success rate in supporting clients to move through difficulties in their relationship. This includes one or both partners who have experienced early trauma. It is shown to to be an extremely effective way of helping distressed couples strengthen their attachment bond, particularly where…

The language of love: how couples communicate

When working with couples I am often struck by how much they love each other! This may sound surprising – by definition the couples I see in my practice have come to me because their relationship is in trouble. However I rarely see couples who say they no longer love each other. In my experience…

Men, Sex and Aging in Relationships

I have previously written about women and the menopause, I am now turning my attention to men, sex and aging in a heterosexual context. Research indicates sexual activity declines with age however as we see older people being portrayed as healthy, attractive and vigorous, we are more likely to acknowledge this age group as sexually…