Often, couples get into a loop where they employ unhelpful behavioural patterns (or survival strategies) to mask their vulnerability. This triggers a similar response in their partner, who then becomes defensive and so on. For example, one person may feel abandoned or rejected, becoming reactive and critical as a result. In response, their partner feels…
Freud once described psychotherapy as the “impossible profession.” To those who have not experienced it, psychotherapy can sound like a curious, mysterious, complex or even frightening endeavour. Using brief and simplistic explanations such as “talking to someone about your problems” to describe psychotherapy does not do it justice. At its best, psychotherapy is a process…
Like many of us, I have been emotionally moved and disturbed by recent political events. Concerns over the choice of US president, the rise of the far right in Europe and Brexit have been driving many of us towards social and political initiatives. I always believed that our work as therapists could make a real difference…
The result of the US presidential election has created shockwaves around the world. The USA is taking its first steps into an uncertain future, with the reverberations of one of history’s most brutal presidential campaigns still echoing. At this time, it seems apposite to reflect on the qualities of a strong leader. Most people would…
Overthinking and overdoing can lead us to feeling stressed and anxious, disrupt our sleep and even lead to depression. We have previously written about the role of psychotherapy in emotional regulation. However, we all need a daily practice with simple steps to quieten the mind and feel more present with ourselves and others. If you…
Two of the most frequent questions we get asked is are there any differences between counselling and psychotherapy and which do I need? Well, one way of thinking about the difference is that counselling is more about having someone walk alongside you during a difficult time. Sometimes this is all that’s needed – someone who…
Eric Berne, the founder of Transactional Analysis (TA) described it as ‘a theory of personality and a systematic psychotherapy for personal growth and change’. In Transactional Analysis Psychotherapy, we adopt the philosophical principles that: – People are fundamentally OK, even if they sometimes behave in not-OK ways; – Everyone (with rare exceptions) has the capacity to…
Judith Herman (1992), writes: “Psychological trauma is an affliction of the powerless. At the moment of trauma, the victim is rendered helpless by overwhelming force. Traumatic events overwhelm the ordinary systems of care that give people a sense of control, connection, and meaning” Although Herman’s book was written more than twenty years ago, and findings…
Like many of us, at the end of each year I like to take some time to reflect on the past year and also look to the year ahead for changes and improvements I’d like to make in the personal and professional areas of my life. The beginning of a new calendar year can be…
This time of year can evoque a range of feelings in most of us. Whilst some of us may have a festive and positive outlook on Christmas and look forward to spending time with friends and family, for many it is a time filled with conflicting emotions. Some of us have difficult memories associated with…
Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy started after Mark and I decided it was time to get our own premises. Finding the right work environment wasn’t easy. We spent years practicing from other clinics, never quite satisfied with the therapy rooms we used. Although, arguably, good therapy work can take place almost anywhere. A warm and welcoming…
After some well earned time off over August, it had been my intention to write a blog on self care for psychotherapists. However, as with all best laid plans, a more pressing topic has come to the forefront our of minds with the recent Shoreham air crash which resulted in the tragic deaths of (at present)…