Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy

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Do we need to do homework during psychotherapy?

For many people the word ‘homework’ stirs up rather negative memories of being forced to stay in when the sun was shining, or toiling over the complexities of maths equations rather than enjoying computer gaming or other hobbies.

But in psychotherapy, engaging in relevant tasks connected with mental wellbeing during the week between sessions can be hugely beneficial in consolidating and enhancing the changes involved in the therapeutic process.

One example of this is practising mindfulness. Time spent in reducing bodily tension and the down regulation of mental processes can yield important new insights and reduce levels of anxiety. It takes only a few minutes of session time to learn simple meditation techniques and they can be practised at home on a daily basis.

A second approach is through journaling. But how can writing help us to relax and lessen mental tension and worries?

Neuroscientist and psychotherapist Louis Cozolino, whose book “Why Therapy Works: Using Our Minds to Change Our Brains” (1), brilliantly explains in accessible terms the key elements of psychotherapy, outlines the important role of narrative and writing in improving our mental health.

A key point here is that all of us develop – as a result of our upbringing and life experiences good and bad – an endlessly shifting internal narrative and dialogue about who we are, our strengths and weaknesses and things that have gone right and wrong in our lives. This translates into the daily barrage of thoughts that enter our brains, and can become a key component in neurosis, a kind of internal echo chamber that intensifies our distress.

Cozolino states (2) :

“Putting feelings into words has long served a positive function for many individuals suffering from stress or trauma. Writing about your experiences supports top-down modulation of emotion and bodily responses … Therapists hope to teach their clients that not only can they edit their present story, they can also be authors of new stories. With the aid of self-reflection, we help our clients to become aware of narrative arcs of their life story and then help them understand that alternative story lines are possible. As the writing and editing proceed, new narrative arcs emerge with the possibility of experimenting with more adaptive ways of thinking, feeling and acting.”

In this context, journaling – broadly writing down what has happened to us and why – can be pivotal in both understanding the events in our lives and the possibilities for change. My recommendation to clients in this domain is to buy a simple hardback A4 sized ruled notebook and then to experiment. There are no hard and fast rules other than making the time to make entries on a loosely regular basis.

The benefits cannot be precisely quantified, but in my experience, they include (as well as those already pointed out by Cozolino):

  • The availability of a vent for the expression of pent-up primary negative emotions: fear, anger, disgust and sadness, as well as – more positively – joy.
  • Gradually gaining deeper insight into our internal experiences.
  • Identifying patterns in thoughts, behaviours and emotions, as well as bringing into focus the triggers that contribute to distress, such as bullying or being subjected to another’s anger.
  • Facilitating mood tracking and the safe processing of difficult experiences.
  • Our minds generate endlessly changing thoughts; journaling allows us to check progress over time, noting changes in thoughts, feelings and behaviours.
  • The writing process can continue the work done in the therapy room and allow clients to rehearse and practise the new approaches that are discussed.

Another key point is that journaling can also become relaxing – a way of unwinding – and even fun. The process of articulating and crystallising our thoughts can be challenging but it also brings its rewards. Our internal thoughts are hard to keep track of, but this is an outlet which can also become like a close friend, a place to unload and unwind.

I have personally written a journal for more than thirty years and began doing so when I first experienced therapy following a panic attack at work (in my then job in the media). It was among my then therapist’s first recommendation to me as his client. With the benefit of hindsight, it was a major turning point in my life that enabled me to build both greater self-esteem and a better sense of competence and agency – essentials in the creation of a secure base, the subject of another blog by me available on this site.

 

David Keighley is a BACP Accredited counsellor/psychotherapist offering short and long term therapy to individuals and couples using a variety of techniques such as EMDR, CBT and Schema Therapy. He is also a trained clinical supervisor.  He is available at our Brighton & Hove Practice.

 

Further reading by David Keighley –

The empty chair in therapy

How therapy can help with anger issues

Do you have unrelenting standards?

Why we need a ‘secure base’

 

(1) Louis Cozolino, Why Therapy Works: Using Our Minds to Change Our Brains, W W Norton & Company, 2016

(2) Ibid p.24-5

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Understanding motivation: insights from neuroscience

Motivation is the spark that drives our behaviours, whether it’s waking up early for work, pursuing a personal goal, or simply seeking enjoyment in daily life. But what exactly fuels this drive? Modern neuroscience offers fascinating insights into the mechanisms behind motivation and its role in our mental well-being.

What is motivation?

Motivation is broadly defined as the energy and direction behind goal-oriented behaviour. It involves not just the desire to achieve a goal but also the persistence to overcome obstacles along the way.

Neuroscientists and psychologists view motivation as a complex process influenced by both internal states—like hunger, emotions, or energy levels—and external cues, such as rewards or social expectations (Simpson & Balsam, 2015).

At its core, motivation connects to survival instincts: seeking food, safety, and companionship. However, it also extends beyond these basic needs, propelling us toward personal fulfilment, creativity, and long-term achievements (Kringelbach & Berridge, 2016).

The neuroscience of motivation

Recent research highlights the intricate brain networks responsible for motivation. These systems involve distinct components often referred to as ‘liking’, ‘wanting’ and ‘learning’ (Kringelbach & Berridge, 2016):

  • Wanting: This refers to the craving or desire for a reward, heavily influenced by dopamine systems. Dopamine surges when we anticipate a pleasurable experience, like enjoying a meal or achieving a goal.
  • Liking: This involves the actual experience of pleasure, regulated by specific ‘pleasure hotspots’ in regions like the nucleus accumbens.
  • Learning: This helps us form associations between actions and rewards. For example, if exercising leads to improved mood, your brain reinforces this connection.
  • Interestingly, these systems can function independently. For instance, someone may intensely ‘want’ something (as seen in addiction) without truly ‘liking’ it (Simpson & Balsam, 2015).

Motivation and mental health

Motivation is closely tied to our emotional wellbeing. A lack of motivation, known as amotivation, is a hallmark symptom in conditions like depression, anxiety, and burnout. Disruptions in the brain’s reward system, particularly dopamine-related circuits, can make even basic tasks feel insurmountable (Kringelbach & Berridge, 2016).

Additionally, anhedonia—a reduced ability to feel pleasure—is often linked to diminished ‘liking’ responses in the brain. Addressing these deficits in therapy can improve motivation and overall mental health (Simpson & Balsam, 2015).

Actionable strategies to boost motivation

Understanding how motivation works can empower us to make meaningful changes. Here are evidence-based strategies:

  • Start small and build momentum: Breaking big goals into smaller, achievable steps can activate the brain’s reward system, creating a positive feedback loop. Celebrate these mini-successes to sustain motivation (Kringelbach & Berridge, 2016).
  • Use intrinsic motivation: Find internal reasons for your actions—pride in your progress, alignment with your values, or a sense of purpose. These tend to have longer-lasting effects compared to external rewards like money.
  • Leverage the power of habits: Consistent actions strengthen neural pathways over time. For example, setting a routine for exercise or journaling can transform these behaviours from effortful to automatic
    (Simpson & Balsam, 2015).
  • Visualise the positive outcomes: Research suggests that imagining yourself successfully achieving a goal can increase motivation by activating the brain’s reward system (Kringelbach & Berridge, 2016).
  • Adjust your environment: Surround yourself with cues that encourage the behaviour you want, such as placing workout clothes in a visible spot or using reminders for tasks.

Conclusion

Motivation is a dynamic and complex interplay of biological, emotional, and environmental factors. By understanding the science behind it, we can take intentional steps to nurture and sustain our drive, whether for personal growth, mental well-being, or achieving long-term goals.

Remember, motivation isn’t simply a matter of willpower—it is deeply rooted in the workings of your brain and can be influenced by practical changes in your mindset and environment.

If you are facing persistent struggles with motivation or joy in daily life, seeking professional help can provide valuable tools to understand and address these challenges.

 

Lucie Ramet, Chartered Psychologist, CBT and ACT, works Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursday afternoons and Fridays from our Brighton and Hove practice, She also offers online sessions.

 

Further reading by Lucie Ramet

Your brain is not for thinking – it’s for survival and balance

Emotions: hardwired tools from our evolutionary past

Embracing a mindful new year: Achieving resolutions with ACT therapy

References –

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Is spirituality an escape from reality?

Spirituality is an important part of our existence. It can provide meaning and purpose, give us a sense of well-being and peace, and provide a philosophical way of being that gives us an ethical code and a way of dealing with adversity. Additionally, it is an important part of personal development that enables us to be more authentic in the world, and to connect with a transcendental dimension that is greater than ourselves.

But can spirituality also be an escape from reality? At times, our spiritual practice and our spiritual philosophy can become a way to avoid reality, and this is called ‘Spiritual Bypassing’.

The term spiritual bypassing describes when we use our spiritual beliefs or practices to avoid or escape from dealing with difficult emotions or personal problems. This could be when we use spirituality as a way to rationalise or justify an avoidance of emotional pain, as well as using spiritual practices as a means of avoiding responsibility or accountability for our actions.

For example, we might use affirmations to deny our feelings of sadness or anger by saying such phrases as “I am happy and content” when we really don’t feel it. While this does have a use in terms of positive psychology, it can also deny and suppress our feelings. As another example, we might believe that everything happens for a reason, and because of this belief not take any action to rectify a problem or take responsibility for our part in a situation. At times, these sorts of ideas can hinder our progress on the spiritual path and also become problematic for our emotional development.

In terms of spiritual practice, this also can become a way of avoiding our emotions and the reality of life. For example, if we are able to get into blissful meditative states, then we might try to spend as much time as possible in such states and deny other experiences. This could then lead to a withdrawal from the world as we attempt to be fully occupied with meditative bliss. While mediation and other practices can lead to a more permanent feeling of bliss and contentment, resolving our underlying emotional issues needs to come first.

While spiritual bypassing can take many forms depending on the person and their practice, below is a list of the more common manifestations.

Denying emotions: This involves using spiritual beliefs to suppress or deny difficult emotions, rather than fully experiencing and processing them.

Overemphasising positivity: This is where we focus exclusively on positive thoughts and feelings, and dismissing or denying negative emotions or experiences.

Avoiding conflict: This involves using spirituality to avoid or minimise conflict, rather than addressing it directly.

Disregard for the physical world: This involves using spirituality to detach from or minimise the importance of the physical world and material concerns.

All of the above, (and this list is not exhaustive) are examples where the underlying thinking is rooted in spiritual philosophy, but that philosophy is taken out of context in order to serve the individual. As such, it can end up being harmful both for the individual and others around them.

It can be quite easy to fall into spiritual bypassing as most spiritual philosophies are beautifully simple and can lead us to thinking that it is an easy task to evolve spiritually as well as emotionally.

However, such development takes a lot of time, practice and self reflection. Working honestly with a good spiritual friend can help us to understand how we are applying spirituality to our lives, and if this is in a healthy manner. But at times we need to take this a step further and work with a therapist to help us resolve our underlying emotional patterns so we can truly bring our spiritual life into reality.

Dr Simon Cassar is an integrative existential therapist, trained in Person-Centred Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT), and Existential Psychotherapy. He is available in our Hove and Lewes clinics and also works online.

 

Further reading by Dr Simon Cassar

Sleep and Mental Health

Spirituality and mental health

Living with borderline personality disorder

Online Therapy

Student mental health – how to stay healthy at university

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Why is Mental Health Important?

Mental Health has become a hot topic in the last few years. We often hear about it in the media, and because of more public awareness about mental health issues, more employers are adopting mental health policies and offering employees more support. Whilst mental health used to be seen as something related to mental illness, nowadays people are talking more about the importance of mental health as a part of their overall wellbeing, such as exercise and healthy eating.

But what is mental health?

Mental health is dependent on a certain degree of emotional, psychological, and social equilibrium. It impacts thinking, feeling and behaviour and therefore our capacity to handle stress, maintain good relationships and make decisions, amongst other things.

Good mental health is a vital aspect of us being able to function well in the world, hence it’s importance. There are environmental, social and psychological factors that can affect our mental state, such as:
– Ongoing real or perceived threat or danger to one’s life and livelihood
– Traumatic experiences/ events, recent or historical
– A physical or mental health diagnosis/ symptoms
– Bereavement and loss
– Breakdown in relationship(s)
– Major life change or life crisis
– Financial problems/ stressors
– Work stress
– Loneliness and isolation
– Discrimination and bullying
– Poor sleep and/ or diet
– Sedentary lifestyle/ lack of exercise
– Lack of light and/ or fresh air
– Noise and pollution

It is only human to have experienced one or several of the list above, therefore mental health is of relevance to everyone.

How to Look After your Mental Health?

Environmental and lifestyle factors:
Many people underestimate the impact of sleep, diet, exercise and sunlight on their mental wellbeing. With the increase in the use of screens and less time spent outdoors, especially in the case of children, these very basic factors are not being attended to, with often drastic impact on quality of life. Poor diet, poor sleep and lack of exercise and natural light are interacting factors. Lack of natural light and fresh air affects our sleep, as does the consumption of certain foods such as sugar and caffeine. Exercise can help improve sleep quality and lead us to want to eat better. Good sleep quality helps combat sugar cravings and when we feel rested need to consume less caffeine, etc. Good habits feed other good habits – it’s a cycle.

Social factors:
We all live in society and in communities within society. A sense of belonging paired with a sense of purpose and meaning are significant factors in our sense of mental wellbeing. We all need social connections and to feel a part of something. This became very apparent during the Covid pandemic when we saw many people’s mental health decline because of social isolation. Good relationships and good support systems make us feel safer and cared
about. Helping others, sharing interests, exchanging ideas and working towards common goals helps create a positive social loop where we feel that our life is meaningful and our contributions matter.

Psychological factors:
Most of us have gone through a crisis, a loss or even suffered significant traumatic event(s). Many of us have also experienced challenges growing up in dysfunctional families or under challenging circumstances. These issues when not attended to psychologically, can easily become cumulative and affect our lives in negative ways, often leading to depression or chronic anxiety. Feeling alone with our problems further exacerbates these issues, creating
a negative cycle that is self-perpetuating.

How Psychotherapy can Help

Psychotherapy can help you get and remain mentally healthy in several ways. A skilled therapist will help you address psychological issues such as the ones listed above. Therapy can be very effective in helping people deal with past traumas, life crisis, relationship issues and process loss, amongst many other things. In psychotherapy you can also explore how certain behaviours are affecting your mental health and how to change or improve them.

Sometimes bad habits tell us something about how we were looked after, and therefore how we end looking after ourselves. Finally, it can also help us get to a better place within ourselves and therefore make better decisions. Sometimes issues are multi-faceted, layered, and complex. Being able to distinguish, pick apart and navigate a seemingly hopeless situation is empowering and puts us back in control of our lives.

 

Sam Jahara is a UKCP Registered Psychotherapist, Superviser and Tavistock Certified Executive Coach.

 

Further reading by Sam Jahara

What makes us choose our career paths?

Antidotes to coercive, controlling and narcissistic behaviour

An in-depth approach to leadership coaching

Demystifying mental health

Women and Anger

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How are you?

How are you at just sitting down quietly by yourself? 

Some years ago I completed a mindfulness meditation course and first encountered the philosopher Pascal‘s assertion that, ‘all the misfortunes of men derive from one single thing, which is their inability to be at ease in a room’. Our teacher suggested Pascal referred to the harm caused due to our periodic inability to tolerate the sheer intensity of thoughts and feelings that can rise within us, when no distractions are available. 

Having worked through meditation guidance books at earlier times in my life, I found attending this formal course was an enriching way to discover that engaging in mindful meditation could be a useful aspect of my own wellbeing.

The paradox of mindfulness – ostensibly sitting alone not ‘doing’ anything – is that it’s an active practice, requiring our presence in the moment and making it a regular habit in order to be effective. The health benefits of mindful meditation have been increasingly suggested in numerous research studies. 

Pioneers such as Jon Kabat-Zinn have taught how cultivating a focused awareness of our thoughts, feelings and physical sensations increases our capacity to tolerate their extremes. 

More recently the psychiatrist Dan Siegel has developed his ‘Wheel of Awareness’ practice: a structured meditation session inviting us to develop both awareness and compassion for ourselves that we then extend to our personal relationships, wider humanity and all life in our natural world.

Just as many have found meditation a valuable resource at particular times of stress or crisis in their lives, so psychotherapy has taken its place as an important activity that addresses the challenges we face in seeking to be at ease with ourselves. 

And for this activity we might turn to the insight of another giant of French thought, Montaigne, who wrote, ‘The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be oneself.’

In the therapeutic process we move beyond sitting with ourselves into a particular kind of beneficial relationship. The therapy room offers us a space where we can enlist the full attention of another person – a trained therapist – who is professionally committed to helping us explore those aspects of ourselves that can be hardest to uncover and often too painful to encounter by ourselves. 

And just as meditation is called a ‘practice’, so psychotherapy is often referred to as ‘the work’ in an acknowledgement of the purposeful regularity of this process of deeply supported self-examination.  

If the goal of mindfulness is to achieve a greater sense of wellbeing though cultivated awareness, it seems to me the aim of psychotherapy is to help us truly know not who, but as Montaigne suggests, how we are in the world. Only by understanding much more about how we have come to think, feel and act in the way we do can we begin to understand how we might choose to be different.

 

Chris Horton is a registered member of the British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy (BACP) and a psychotherapeutic counsellor with experience in a diverse range of occupational settings.

 

Further reading by Chris Horton

Out of Sight, Out of Mind

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Why am I feeling more anxiety with Covid-19?

During the last 100 days, all of our lives, across the globe, have been turned upside down. Whilst scientifically overdue and rationally unsurprising, the pandemic has shaken the foundations of our outer, and thus, inner worlds. What we came to see as normal has been curtailed or removed; what we relied on for our own sense of normality has been fractured. 

Is everybody feeling more anxious? 

No, but that does not make those who are wrong or ill. Some people are feeling less anxious as their ‘ordinary’ level of anxiety (which may be quite high) now have an outlet – something tangible to attach to. Think of the example of a soldier who is able to thinking function efficiently in a war zone but who, upon returning home to an ‘ordinary’ environment, struggles to function as they locate threat behind every corner. 

There are also some who have a healthy relationship with their ‘anxious’ selves and are able to recognise the source of their anxiety and to use it whilst holding onto a thinking mind – such folks may feel a broader and deeper range of all their emotions at present but would not describe themselves as ‘more anxious’. This is possible for us all. 

We are all going to die! 

It is a fact – no way round it – we are all going to die. Though probably not from Covid-19. In fact the likelihood of death from Covid-19 is statistically very low. 

I am not interested in getting into the actual mortality rates etc. for Covid as they have little to do with the anxiety I am addressing – suffice to say that Covid is real and each death is a personal tragedy – like deaths always are. 

However, there is more than meets the eye in the sub-heading of this section of my blog which may shed some light on heightened anxiety levels which I shall attempt to explain. 

Let’s start with the premise that human beings, generally, have a strong biological drive to live – like all other mammals. 

Back to Freud 

Freud posited that the majority of our decision making and therefore emotional work remained largely unconscious to us. He was right about this as has been evidenced in neuroscience experiments. 

Freud also suggested that we have a profoundly unconscious fear of death linked to our consciousness of self – we know that we are alive and therefore we also know we must die and this presents a dilemma. 

All anxiety is death anxiety 

Anxiety is not like the other emotions. It is free floating and pervasive. We all must live with anxiety whether it dominates our experience or is just a flicker on the horizon. 

All other emotions are ‘attached’ to something in that we generally know or can work out why we feel a certain way. We generally know what we feel happy or sad for example – and if we don’t the psychotherapy can uncover the reasons. 

Anxiety is different in the sense that it ‘seeks to attach’ to something. So, rather than being anxious about a presentation, a flight, an exam or a date, our anxiety ‘finds’ something in our environment and then attaches to that convincing us that that thing is what is causing our anxiety. 

Of course real things cause anxiety, however, on a profound (ontological) level, all anxiety stems from an unconscious but ubiquitous knowledge that we are going to die. It is therefore death anxiety. 

Covid represents the perfect vehicle to which our anxiety can attach – it kills. Just not very many of us. It is not a Hollywood movie like Independence Day where the enemy will destroy us all unless we mount a global war (and towards an enemy that we can see – and is monster-like). Covid is invisible to us but nonetheless has triggered a profound death anxiety in all of us – we are primed to feel anxious in the face of death as though we are hard-wired. 

What can I do? 

Earlier I mentioned the term ‘a thinking mind’ and this is one I have written about before. Even though are all primed to feel more anxious when reminded of death (check our Terror Management Theory for empirical evidence of this), it does not mean we need to lose our rational minds and succumb to the anxiety and the accompanying acting out. 

Your mind is capable of thinking and scanning for evidence. For example, if you are reading this piece right now, stop breathe and look around you. Look out of a window and notice that in this precise moment, you are not dying. You can use your sense to ground you: 

  • What can I see; 
  • What can I hear; 
  • What can I smell; 
  • What can a taste; 
  • What can I seen – my breath, my heartbeat, tension in my body etc. 

I must buy toilet paper! 

Much has been made of the compulsive need to purchase toilet paper as the pandemic emerged and took hold. And this seem to be a global rather than local phenomenon (though Americans seem to have a compulsive need to purchase firearms – but that adds confirmation to the theory below). 

So why toilet paper? Well, when anxious humans would rather do something rather than just sit there – and what we often need to do is stop and just sit there. Particularly when we are not about to immediately die. 

Toilet paper is intricately linked to a biological need that we would prefer didn’t exist. The need to defecate. The need to defecate links us to nature and to being, at least in a significant part, animal. Being linked to nature and thus being an animal means that we are mortal – something that is unconsciously unbearable for the part of us that is ‘God-like’ and able to project ourselves back into the past or forward into the future. In short, toilet paper became a manic defense against death but ensuring that we had the ability in the face of death to ‘wipe away’ any evidence of our animal nature. 

Briefly returning to the questions of guns and our American friends – I posit that guns are the way Americans take responsibility for avoiding death anxiety – by protecting themselves against the enemy. Perhaps thank Hollywood for this (even though Covid-19 cannot be shot). Oh, and I am fairly sure they also stocked up on toilet paper.

 

Mark Vahrmeyer, UKCP Registered, BHP Co-founder is an integrative psychotherapist with a wide range of clinical experience from both the public and private sectors. He currently sees both individuals and couples, primarily for ongoing psychotherapy.  Mark is available at the Lewes and Brighton & Hove Practices.

 

Further reading by Mark Vahrmeyer –

Why psychotherapy sessions should end on time

Coronavirus Induced Mental Health Issues

Coronavirus (Covid-19) Counselling

How being ordinary is increasingly extraordinary – On the role of narcissistic defences

Face to Face and Online Therapy Help Available Now

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Back to ‘BACE’ics

Achieving a work – life balance is an important aspect of mental wellbeing and can easily become out of sync without us even realising it, particularly when we are feeling under significant pressure from one of these two areas – in other words,  stressed.  This imbalance can lead to feelings of depression and anxiety .  One useful tool you can use to get some perspective and move back into a position of feeling like you have some control is by keeping an activity diary for a a week (and ideally longer) which can provide us with useful information on where the loss of balance in our life lies.  It can be helpful to separate out the different needs we have into four distinct areas:

1/ Bodily Self Care – this includes how we look after our physical body, i.e. exercise, nutrition, rest and sleep, self-grooming, medication, etc.

2/ Achievement – this includes work, study, housework, any tasks / activities that give us a sense of having achieved something concrete.

3/ Connecting with others – this can be family, friends, work colleagues – in person, over the telephone or social media.  It can simply be being in an environment where there are others as long as we feel connected. It can also include connecting with animals.  Our pets can be very therapeutic in helping us to feel calmer.

4/ Enjoyment – hobbies, interests, fun activities, relaxing activities – anything that gives us a sense of pleasure and joy.

Categorise how you are spending your time each day into the four areas.  Sometimes one activity may fulfil more than one category, e.g. walking the dog can be exercise so would meet bodily self care, it could also be an achievement if you really didn’t feel like going, it could be connecting with others as you may have met other dog walkers, and you may have enjoyed it.

By monitoring your activity according to these categories it will give you a useful overview of how you are spending your time and gain a sense of where there are gaps – where it might be necessary to make some changes to re-balance your life.

In my work as a CBT therapist one of the areas that I frequently see my clients neglecting is under the category of enjoyment, and specifically, in having fun.  We can get so caught up with work and what we think we should be doing we can lose sight of enjoyment and connecting with others.  Or we may have crammed so much into our day that we have no time to stop and just be.

Activity monitoring can be a useful tool for anyone who wants to take stock of their life and see whether they are tending to all the different areas in their life which, when combined, create a sense of positive mental well-being.  If you would like a structure in undertaking this activity then you can use a form called BACE (https://www.get.gg/docs/BACEdiary-weekly.pdf)  which is a daily activity monitoring form.  You will notice that the word BACE is the acronym for the four areas.

Once you have gathered the information and highlighted the areas that need to be addressed you can use the same form as a daily planner to set manageable and  achievable goals to shift the balance and address the gaps.

Sometimes the simplest strategies are the most helpful.

 

Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy is a collective of experienced psychotherapists, psychologists and counsellors working with a range of client groups, including fellow therapists and health professionals. If you would like more information, or an informal discussion please get in touch. Online therapy is available.

 

Face to Face and Online Therapy Help Available Now

Click Here to Enquire

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Spirituality and Mental Health

Spirituality is an often-used term these days, and around 20% of the population in the UK define themselves as spiritual, but not in the religious sense. So what does it mean to be spiritual?

There are many definitions of spirituality but generally we could say that it involves having a sense of something bigger than ourselves – a transcendental view of life where we start to realise that there is more to life that we see around us. This can include a sense that there is a God or creator, an intelligence in the universe, or maybe a deeper wisdom that we all carry. However we conceptualise it, spirituality often leads to a greater sense of purpose and meaning as we start to step back from the everyday world and see a bigger picture playing out before us. Spirituality also includes a sense of connectedness, which might be with others, ourselves or with something more transcendental. This feeling of connectedness can bring us a great deal of peace as we start to realise that perhaps we are not alone in the world. 

Spirituality is different from religion, but is linked to it. Religion is about adhering to a set of doctrines that define each particular faith. Religion will often have a spiritual component – a worldview that has an idea of something greater than us (God, for example) and may also involve a spiritual connection as part of the religious practice. However, you do not need to be religious to be spiritual, and indeed being religious doesn’t need to be spiritual!

So how important is spirituality to our mental health and wellbeing? There has been a lot of research over the past decade that considers this question. The findings show that engaging in spiritual practices have a positive impact on our mental health. Lower levels of depression can be found in those who are actively involved in spiritual communities. Levels of stress and anxiety can be lowered by engaging in spiritual practices, and spirituality can be instrumental in the recovery from trauma. Also, there can be a greater sense of purpose and meaning from having a spiritual perspective, which can have a positive impact on our wellbeing. 

Having a committed spiritual practice – whether it is mediation, prayer, or whatever feels right for you – reading spiritual philosophy and engaging with a spiritual or religious community can be hugely beneficial in improving and maintaining positive mental health. Even if you don’t consider yourself to be spiritual, it is worth spending a few moments thinking about life and the wonders that we see around us. It is easy to see that there is more to life than our own limited worldview and when we step back and consider this, our problems and daily issues can be put into perspective as we gain a more holistic view of life.

 

Dr Simon Cassar is an integrative existential therapist, trained in Person Centred Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT), and Existential Psychotherapy. He is available in our Hove and Lewes clinics and also works online.

 

Further reading by Dr Simon Cassar –

Living with borderline personality disorder

Online Therapy

Student mental health – how to stay healthy at university

Four domains – maintaining wellbeing in turbulent times

Face to Face and Online Therapy Help Available Now

Click Here to Enquire

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Emotional Well-being

When most people hear the words ‘mental health’ perhaps what they are most likely to think of is mental difficulties, or mental ill-health.  I always think it’s such a shame that ‘mental health’ has these negative connotations, whereas just the word ‘health’ doesn’t seem to. 

I am a big believer in being proactive about mental health and wellbeing, and in the importance of doing things to stay mentally and emotionally well – just as you might keep active, eat a healthy diet and clean your teeth to keep your body well and healthy.  There is, perhaps unsurprisingly, a huge overlap between a person’s emotional and physical wellbeing. The negative impact of stress on health and wellbeing has been well researched. 

Positive Psychology is a branch of psychology founded by Martin Seligman, which is concerned with the positive aspects of life; it focuses on potential and thriving, or as one book puts it ‘positive psychology is concerned not with how to transform, for example, -8 to -2 but with how to bring +2 to +8’.[1]

So, what might be the emotional equivalents of cleaning your teeth or keeping active be?  There are lots of ideas that can be helpful, and some will suit certain people more than others.  It is worth trying out a few different ideas to see what works well for you.  Using a planner can help, to ensure that you are regularly and frequently doing something specifically to have a positive impact on your emotional wellbeing.  It’s good to have a mixture of things across a week, including things that bring you pleasure and things that bring a sense of satisfaction or accomplishment. 

The list below includes different ideas and strategies drawn from Positive Psychology, and other areas of psychology:

  • Engaging in physical activity
  • Noticing your strengths
  • Actively relaxing – this could be using imagery, or a progressive muscle relaxation
  • Random acts of kindness
  • Spending time engaging in hobbies
  • Spending time with, and investing in close relationships
  • Completing the ‘Three good things’ exercise; every night for a week spend some time to identify and write down three things that were good about the day and notice your role in them
  • Thinking about someone you are grateful to or for, and telling them about it
  • Spending some time paying attention to the present moment (Mindfulness)

 

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[1] Positive Psychology in a Nutshell, 2nd edition.  Boniwell, I. (2008).

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Four domains – maintaining wellbeing in turbulent times

Recent geopolitical events, notably the new American administration and the Brexit vote, have for many of us brought on feelings of uncertainty about the future. Facing this type of uncertainty can lead to feelings of  anxiety driven by a loss of what we thought we could rely on or expect from life. Alternatively, we can experience despair and ultimately, depression about our powerlessness to affect what may happen in the future. While we may not be able to predict or have a big impact on what may be coming, we can do a lot to look after our wellbeing. This may enable us to face the future with a degree of equanimity.

 The concept of wellbeing is much spoken about, and can be viewed from a complex academic perspective. At the other end of the spectrum, it can become a rather glib, throwaway term. However, we can look after our own personal wellbeing by paying attention to four important domains in our lives. Putting a bit of effort into each can help us to feel better in ourselves and can contribute to us maintaining a positive worldview.

The Physical Domain

Looking after our physical health is a key part of wellbeing. For some, this is a part of everyday life. Going to the gym, running or playing team sports are great ways to increase physical fitness, and all enable us to feel more rooted in our body.

However, this level of physical effort is not for everyone. We can do a lot to increase our physical health by simply walking a little more than we might do normally. This is promoted actively by the NHS, which outlines the positive physical and emotional benefits of being more active each day. 

It may seem daunting to reach the desired goal of 10,000 steps per day, however, merely increasing how much we move around in our bodies each day takes us a long way towards increasing our physical health and fitness. For example, we might choose a longer route when we have to walk, stroll around the block after dinner, or walk up stairs rather than using the lift.

 Of course, increasing our physical activity is only part of the matter. We also need to consider our diet and aim to eat as healthily as possible.

The Emotional Domain

Looking after our emotional health is also very important in improving our overall wellbeing. This can be as easy has having open and honest conversations with those who are close to us, which is a great way to deepen our relationships. Alternatively, writing a daily journal to explore our deepest thoughts and feelings can help us understand ourselves better and make sense of our inner world. Seeking professional help from a therapist is also an important step if our emotional world becomes overwhelming, or if we are unable to make sense of what is going on for us.

The Intellectual Domain

Our intellectual health is another very important area. It can often be overlooked once we have finished with formal education and then again when we retire from paid employment. However, keeping our minds sharp and alert to new ideas can be very inspiring and satisfying. It also helps us to approach the world from a fresh perspective. We can look after our intellectual health by taking a course (there are many free online courses available), reading an inspiring book that gives us new knowledge, or even by watching some of the short, powerful talks we can find on websites such as TED. 

The Spiritual Domain

The spiritual domain can often be overlooked, but can be hugely important to our overall wellbeing. For those who are religious, this can consist of spending a little more time in contemplation or prayer. For those who are not religious, spending a few moments each day in quiet meditation or practicing mindfulness (or even taking one of the many available mindfulness courses) can be very beneficial and can help to attain greater inner peace and an enhanced perspective on the world. If none of these appeal, you could simply spend a few moments each day noticing the beauty of the natural world around us. A key element of mindfulness is connecting with you body whilst connecting with the wider world simultaneously. Simply being in your body whilst noticing the smells, sounds and feelings that arise is a form of mindfulness practice.

Actively working for a short while in each of these domains every week can do a great deal to improve physical and mental energy levels. It can also give a sense of control of one thing we can have a huge impact on… our own wellbeing.

Dr Simon Cassar is an integrative existential therapist, trained in Person Centred Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT), and Existential Psychotherapy.

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