Who to tell that you’re in therapy? And why?

Alice Ayres Sitting on the Tube with a relatively new friend, I suddenly found myself feeling awkward in the middle of an anecdote. “And on a Thursday evening, I…I…” I cast a sideways glance at him. How would he react? Could I trust him not to judge me negatively? In the heat of the moment,…

Beginning therapy – the first appointment

Alice Ayres reflects on her first session with her therapist. How did I feel back then? When I’m looking back at a difficult period of my life from a position of relative stability, I tend to minimise how bad things really felt for me back then. I think this is a fairly common thing. I…

Therapy – a client’s perspective

An introduction Hello. I’m Alice Ayres. Up until now on this blog, it’s always been the therapists speaking. This is the first of a series of blog posts in which I will be presenting a view from the other chair, the view of the client. I hope it will be useful to those considering or…

On Affect Regulation

The term ‘affect regulation’ is one that I have written about previously and one that is increasingly used in the world of applied psychology and neuroscience. It can be a very useful term for bringing together psychology, biology and in explaining why good psychotherapy works, so read on! What is regulation? We all regulate (manage)…

My approach to psychotherapy

Every psychotherapist has a view on what therapy is and how they practice. As I write this blog, I am drawn to my bookshelf filled with tomes by both historical and modern clinicians, detailing precisely how to practice this art that is psychotherapy. Having recently commissioned a set of videos introducing Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy…

What doesn’t kill us makes us weaker: Developmental trauma and attachment styles

There is a lot of wisdom in sayings that have been part of our language and culture for as long as we can remember. For example, being ‘on the back foot’, meaning to be at a disadvantage or on the defensive, is a perfect expression of how our relationship to our body influences how we…

New Year Reflections

Like many of us, at the end of each year I like to take some time to reflect on the past year and also look to the year ahead for changes and improvements I’d like to make in the personal and professional areas of my life. The beginning of a new calendar year can be…

The Therapy Room

Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy started after Mark and I decided it was time to get our own premises. Finding the right work environment wasn’t easy. We spent years practicing from other clinics, never quite satisfied with the therapy rooms we used. Although, arguably, good therapy work can take place almost anywhere. A warm and welcoming…

Trauma

My heart is racing and I feel constantly under threat, even though there is nothing to fear. Emotionally it is like I’m in a war zone, ready to defend or attack, even though it’s peaceful here. I look over my shoulder, tense up with certain sounds. I’m scared for my life and for the life…

5 Reasons to Join a Therapy Group

“The person is comprehensible only within this tapestry of relationships, past and present” (Mitchell, 1988). Despite the great therapeutic benefits of psychotherapy groups, unfortunately they are sparsely offered within the therapeutic community. This may have something to do with the current focus on individual therapy, lack of will (or skill) of therapists in leading groups,…

The Value of Therapy Quantified

We live in an age where increasingly our value of anything comes down to money. Even environmentalists are needing to show the value of ecosystems and specific species of animals, in order to put forward a robust case for conservation. Little wonder then that the question of the value of counselling and psychotherapy in monetary…

Suicide: A Largely Male Solution

In February of this year, The Guardian newspaper published two articles on the dramatic rise in male suicide figures in the UK over the past 30 years. I should imagine that this makes sad and disturbing reading for many, but it particularly spoke to me as I am a man. And a psychotherapist. The statistics…