During Brexit, there was a lot of talk about how it divided our country. So we thought we would discuss how humans are divided and how Psychotherapy can ease some of the conflicts we have with ourselves and others. A personal ‘split’ can happen when we think or act in a way that doesn’t align…
This is the first in a series of blog posts about couples therapy. In this post I want to talk about what Mary Morgan from Tavistock Relationships calls a ‘couple state of mind’. Why if our partner is ‘right’ for us don’t they understand us completely? There are limits to how much we can ever…
Our decisions navigate us through, and throughout, our lives. This blog is not intended to be a comprehensive explanation about decision making, neither is it a guide for how to make better decisions. I simply offer some thoughts about what I see as some of the reasons that decision-making can feel hard or even painful….
This piece is written by a ‘fictional’ client who is a composite of three real-life clients who have shared their experience of psychotherapy with me. Some details have been changed to ensure confidentiality, however, the thoughts feeling and experiences expressed are those of three very real clients: When I came to psychotherapy I did not…
The term ‘mindfulness’ is much spoken about these days, especially in relation to mental health and wellbeing. But what does it really mean? Mindfulness generally relates to a meditation practice that has its origins in Buddhism. It is thought that the Buddha was practicing mindfulness when he gained enlightenment, and it is one of the…
Most of us have to work in order to live. For many, work can take up a large proportion of our waking lives with up to a third of our lives being spent at work. While the primary reason for working is to make money, our work life can (and should) be much more than…
A Response to Johann Hari’s Book – Lost Connections As a psychotherapist, I welcome honest debates about mental health, as they can help reduce the stigma and isolation of many sufferers experience. Recently, a book has been published by controversial author Johann Hari, that has created a bit of a storm, in which he claims to…
Warning – This article contains spoilers for anyone who has not seen the movie Lady Bird. A critical success, this film about a mother and daughter relationship falls into the ‘coming of age’ genre, however it is also so much more than this in considering the systemic and unconscious processes at work that make…
Come the New Year, come the idea to make some changes; to get fit, to be happier, to drink less – the list goes on. I am sure it is a well-researched fact that sales of self-help books increase in January, as does gym membership. And yet how often does the resolve dissolve after a…
The relationship between a psychotherapist and their supervisor is a very important one. Supervision is a vital place to reflect on clinical dilemmas, talk about professional issues and learn from someone more experienced. It can also be a self-care exercise. It feels good to talk to a trusted colleague about our work in a confidential…
Remember when I told you that panic attacks originate in the body and can therefore only be controlled through our relationship with the body? It is called Soft Belly – Soft Throat – Soft Tongue. This is how you do it: You can do this process any time, anywhere. While it is ideal to do…
Panic attacks can be terrifying and debilitating. They can feel as if you are going to die and like you have lost control of your body. While nobody has literally died from a panic attack, feeling out of control and overcome by fear and anxiety can be one of the most unpleasant experiences. It causes…