How do we bring to mind what is unconscious? Is it important to make this journey? These two questions are central to the therapeutic process of psychological therapy. When we are young we depend on our primary carer’s usually our parents, to hold and contain our emotional needs. In childhood, none of us have a…
“Why do we like the frantic, the unmastered?” Asks Virginia Woolf, in her diaries. This is a question I also return to time and time again as I look out to sea. Feeling the disquiet holds an edge of excitement for me, there is a thrill to its wild and unknown nature. For me there…
Our capacity for intimacy as adults is widely understood to be shaped by our early relational experiences. Theorists from diverse orientations emphasise the link between early attachment patterns and subsequent adult love relationships. When our formative experience is one of loving reciprocity with our caregivers, our abilities to give and receive love freely and fully…
For the past year we have largely been confined to our homes, a lot of us working from home and only going out for regular exercise. Our social lives have been depleted, we’ve not been able to see friends and family and generally life may have become quite repetitive. As we come out of lockdown…
‘Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways’. This quote, widely attributed to Freud, is both simple and profound in context. With this statement, Freud (if they are indeed his words) is defining one of the pillars of psycho-analysis and psychotherapy – to uncover repressed and…
For those of you that don’t know, Love Island is a British ‘reality television’ concept that has become a global phenomenon. Arguably deriving from the first global reality programme, Big Brother, which launched in 1997 it is the latest incarnation of this genre. The premise is one whereby a group of (young, physically attractive) singletons…
When people come into therapy it is usually with the wish or hope for something to change. If not, they want help with adapting or stabilising following a major change. It is a paradox that change is such a constant in our lives. As we age our bodies inevitably change and if nothing else this…
Transactional Analysis (TA) is a widely recognised form of modern counselling and psychotherapy, originally conceived by Eric Berne in the 1950’s and which is now used not only in therapy but also in education and organisational training and consultancy. It is a theory of personality, behaviour and communication, and draws on tools and methodology from…
I am writing a follow on from the wonderful blog written by Gerry Gilmartin back in August. 6 months on and here we are again, facing new Covid-related challenges with more restrictive measures in place, more infections and more deaths. The theme of Gerry’s blog revolves around fear and hope, and how to work with…
Many people who engage in therapy will often ask for advice on managing anxiety, their relationship situation, what to do about a tricky work situation or even just general life advice. However, what a lot of clients are really asking for is reassurance on their decision. For many clients who come to us looking for…
There is a lot of talk about how Covid-19 and the resulting lockdown cycles are causing a mental health crisis in the UK. This blog aims to unpack and list some of the reasons why the response to the pandemic is also causing a mental health epidemic amongst us. This year has been very hard…
This blog is a re-post with some further reflections in it to account for not only Christmas is a challenging time, but that Christmas during a pandemic may be a particularly challenging time. Original blog post from 25 December 2017: Christmas can be an emotionally challenging and difficult time for many of us. There…