For some children, school is a place of growth, friendship, and discovery. For others, however, walking through the gates each morning can feel like an uphill climb. The school day may seem long, and the combination of lessons, friendships, and expectations can stir emotions that children find difficult to express. Parents often notice the signs at home: a sudden tummy ache before leaving in the morning, or tears that appear at night when the lights go out.

Why does school feel so overwhelming for some young people? The reasons vary from child to child. For some, the sheer busyness of the environment makes it difficult to settle. For others, the pressure to achieve academically can weigh heavily. The social world of peers may feel unpredictable, even threatening. At times, a child may not fully understand why they feel uneasy—only that the feeling persists. Psychotherapy offers a space to slow down, explore these worries, and begin to make sense of what might otherwise feel confusing or overwhelming.

In my work, I have often seen how school-related anxiety connects with a child’s inner world as much as the outer one. A moment of separation from a parent could stir earlier feelings of loss. A difficult relationship with a teacher may echo past struggles with authority or trust. When this happens, a child’s anxiety is not only about the immediate situation, but also about the echoes of past experiences that have shaped how safety and danger are felt.

Support is rarely about rushing to take the anxiety away. More often, it is about staying with the child, showing them that their feelings can be held without judgement. A quiet space, a listening ear, or the presence of an adult who can bear their distress without turning away might begin to restore a sense of safety. Psychotherapy can offer a steady space where these feelings can be spoken, played out, or simply held.

Anxiety in children does not always appear as obvious worry. It may show up as irritability, withdrawal, or even a determination to appear cheerful. These disguises might be a child’s way of protecting themselves from feeling too exposed. Psychotherapy can help to uncover what lies behind the mask, allowing the child to explore feelings they have struggled to name. Sometimes, this begins with noticing tension in the body before words are ready. At other times, it may involve play or storytelling, where feelings can surface indirectly.

Children often show remarkable resilience when their anxiety is understood rather than dismissed. School may still feel challenging, but with the support of psychotherapy, this experience could shift from something unmanageable to something tolerable, and even into an opportunity for growth.

Jonny McAuley works with children and adolescents and through his training, it has equipped him to be able to use skills and approaches that allow him to work with young children who may not have the emotional vocabulary to express themselves. He works from our Brighton and Hove practice and our Lewes practice.  He also offers online sessions.

To enquire about psychotherapy sessions with Jonny, please contact him here, or to view our full clinical team, please click here.