Object relations theory describes the development, structure and functioning of the human psyche. Although evolved from ideas earlier in the 1900’s, it came to fruition with British psychoanalytic thinking and practice in the 1940s and 50s. Its most notable proponent was Child Psychotherapist Melanie Klein, but further developed by others such as Ronald Fairbairn, Donald…
Over two blogs I have focussed on one area of sibling relationships, namely rivalry. In part 1, I looked at some aspects of sibling rivalry as they can surface in childhood. In part 2, I will suggest how these might impact on ongoing struggles in adult life, before suggesting ways in which problematic issues with…
The importance and role of sibling rivalry Siblings are the longest standing relationships in most of our lives. As we grow older they increasingly serve to keep a connection to our families of origin, reminding us of our parents and our younger selves. Most of us share genetic material and family histories with our…
Most of us, at one time or another, have avoided groups. Whether it was not attending a party, preferring to stay at home and watch TV after a long week or finding a reason not to go to that meeting at work because it always makes us feel uncomfortable. When I suggest to a client…
Psychotherapy is many things, but on a fundamental level it is about the integration of split-off parts of ourselves. This cannot be achieved without the integration of psyche and soma (body), which is the function of the mind. We need the mind of another to grow a mind and this is what happens in the relationship…
Take the following situation: a client seeks psychotherapy to deal with anxiety and other related physical symptoms such as heart palpitations, IBS, stomach pains, etc. They are used to a solution-focused approach and can want quick answers from me. I feel rushed and pulled to meet them in their anxious place – to offer solutions,…
If we could take a child’s logic and apply it to the arena of psychological injury we may be better equipped to deal with the emotional pain and suffering that is an inescapable part of being human. None of us is immune to heart ache. We are relational beings and cannot help but be touched…
In this blog I share my view on how to work with a fictitious client. The “client” James, is a high achieving barrister in his mid-thirties presents with severe anxiety. He has recently started a new relationship and they are thinking of moving in together. Client background The “client” James, is a high achieving barrister…
Panic attacks can be terrifying. When experiencing a panic attack we feel out of control and at the mercy of what is happening in our bodies. We are overwhelmed and unable to ‘think our way out’ of what is happening to us; indeed, it is not uncommon to imagine that we may be dying. As…
Recently Mark Vahrmeyer interviewed Dr. Simon Cassar on the topic of Existential Psychotherapy. This is the first in a series of interviews and VLOGS into the topic of psychotherapy generally. So, please check out the interview and we would welcome any feedback or suggestions for future VLOGS.
Bipolar disorder, previously known as manic depression, is a mood disorder that is thought to affect about 1% of the UK population. Typically, the onset of Bipolar disorder is at around 15-19 years, although some may develop it later on. What are the symptoms of bipolar disorder? The symptoms of Bipolar disorder are mood related,…
People often arrive in therapy looking for answers to life’s difficulties. This might seem like a reasonable proposition. However, it pre-supposes that there might be such a thing as a simple answer to any of the thorny challenges life presents, and, indeed, that the therapist is an “expert” on life, uniquely qualified in their provision….
There is a lot of hype surrounding mindfulness at present. The NHS now sees it as a psychological intervention, and large corporations recognise that calm, happy employees are more productive. But how realistic is mindfulness, a secularised and stripped-down version of the Buddhist practice of meditation, as a long-term psychological intervention? What is Mindfulness? Mindfulness…
There is No Such Thing as a Baby I frequently blog about the importance about including the body in the process of psychotherapy and how the unconscious resides in the body. However, unlike many ‘body psychotherapists,’ I believe that the involvement of the body is more profound than identifying the presence of the body in…
Most of us have to work in order to live. For many, work can take up a large proportion of our waking lives with up to a third of our lives being spent at work. While the primary reason for working is to make money, our work life can (and should) be much more than…
We Need You! Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy is expanding thanks to consistently increasing demand across our Hove and Lewes practices. We are seeking an experienced and motivated psychotherapist who has the clinical training and experiential background to work with individuals and couples, ideally splitting their practice between our clinics in Hove and Lewes. This is…
Couples can often get into familiar and fixed patterns of relating which can be deeply unsatisfying to both parties. This style of relating is one which can eventually seriously threaten the health and longevity of a relationship. In this brief blog, I open a window onto a session which explores a particular dynamic which I frequently encounter…
A Response to Johann Hari’s Book – Lost Connections As a psychotherapist, I welcome honest debates about mental health, as they can help reduce the stigma and isolation of many sufferers experience. Recently, a book has been published by controversial author Johann Hari, that has created a bit of a storm, in which he claims to…
Warning – This article contains spoilers for anyone who has not seen the movie Lady Bird. A critical success, this film about a mother and daughter relationship falls into the ‘coming of age’ genre, however it is also so much more than this in considering the systemic and unconscious processes at work that make…
For many women in the 21st century, the menopause leads to a sense of freedom, independence and creativity. Of course, I want to celebrate this, but I also want to talk about less welcome aspects. Culturally, the menopause is still somewhat feared and is something of a taboo. It is also open to derision and…