‘Self-esteem’ is a psychological term referring to how we evaluate our worth in the context of our relationships and society as a whole. Therefore, when we describe ourselves as having low self-esteem, we believe that we have very little value, or worth, as people. That we are unlovable.
What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem is essentially the opinion we have of ourselves. Healthy self-esteem is when you feel positive about yourself and your life in general. Low self-esteem, on the other hand, makes you look at yourself and your life in a negative or critical light.
What causes low self-esteem?
Low self-esteem is caused by a range of things but usually stems from childhood and a poor self-perception which is then often reinforced by leading a life lacking any meaning. Although many messages we receive from our loved ones can be positive, it is the negative messages that will stay with you and can contribute cause low self-esteem.
When is therapy for low self-esteem required?
Therapy that focuses on low self esteem is most commonly used when it is affecting your daily life in a significant way. For example, you may be having difficulty with tasks, experiencing mood swings, having constant negative thoughts about yourself, or having trouble at work or school. You may also feel depressed.
If you’re noticing these symptoms, therapy can help you explore your feelings and help you change your view of yourself.
Common causes of low self-esteem
Although most cases of low self-esteem stem from childhood, there are other causes that can be identified, including:
- Trying to live up to other people’s expectations.
- Experiencing difficult life events.
- Mental health problems like anxiety or depression.
- Physical health problems such as disability.
- Lack of affection, praise, love, or encouragement.
- Inability to fit in with your peer group.
Types of therapy for low self-esteem
There is no one specific approach to working with issues around low self esteem, however, CBT or cognitive behaviour therapy can be very useful to combat negative thoughts. As low self esteem is also linked to a lack of meaning and purpose in life, an exploratory approach such as an existential or psychoanalytic approach can be very helpful.
The benefits of therapy for low self-esteem
Low self-esteem can affect any and all aspects of life, from personal relationships to career aspirations. Here are just a few benefits of counselling if you suffer from low self-esteem.
Improved self-image
Counselling helps individuals work through the negative preconceptions they have about themselves and develop a more compassionate view. This helps clients to reframe their thoughts which can build confidence and reduce anxiety.
Boosted confidence
Through counselling, individuals can gain a better understanding of their strengths which improves their sense of self-worth. With increased confidence, clients are more likely to face challenges, set goals, and pursue opportunities.
Coping mechanisms
Counselling helps individuals struggling with their self-esteem by equipping them with practical coping strategies like mindfulness and stress management to help navigate feelings of low self-worth more effectively.
Improved relationships
If you struggle with low self-esteem, you may find it hard to set boundaries or express needs in relationships. Counselling can help to raise self-esteem which helps individuals develop healthier communication skills.
Reduced anxiety
Low self-esteem often goes hand-in-hand with anxiety as many individuals worry excessively about judgement or failure. By engaging in self-esteem counselling, your therapist will help you address these fears and apply techniques to overcome them.
What to expect from your therapy sessions
The ultimate goal of help with low self-esteem is to aid you in creating a stronger sense of self-worth that leads to improved relationships, reduced anxiety, and a more positive outlook on life.
First sessions
During the first session, your therapist will ask you a range of questions to figure out the root issues and how best to help you move forward. Your therapist will explain the process and answer any of your own questions. This is also the time to determine whether you feel comfortable enough with the therapist to move forward with the sessions.
Ongoing sessions
In ongoing sessions, your therapist will work closely with you to uncover the underlying causes of your low self-esteem. Together, you will develop and practice effective tools and coping strategies to navigate future challenges, while building a healthier self-image and greater self-confidence.
Our therapists
All of our team are skilled in working with issues such as low self esteem and exploring what will give you a sense of purpose and meaning.
Why choose Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy
At Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy, we have fully trained and qualified therapists who can help with low self-esteem. Our team of therapists are dedicated to helping their clients gain a positive outlook on themselves, and develop the confidence and resilience needed to navigate life’s challenges. Low self-esteem can feel debilitating and can hold us back not only from achieving in our lives but also from even feeling entitled to be content, happy or have healthy meaningful relationships. Our psychotherapists will work with you to uncover the root cause of your low self-esteem and to process the emotions relating to this, in order to start to weaken the roots of your faulty belief system and build up healthy self-esteem.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I know if I am struggling with self-esteem issues?
Clients suffering from low self-esteem often find themselves stuck in a loop of negative thinking and feeling. They can harshly judge themselves and be highly critical of anything they undertake. This in turn fuels the feelings of worthlessness and low self-esteem. If this feels familiar then it may be that you are struggling with low self-esteem.
Can counselling for low self-esteem help with anxiety and depression?
Yes, anxiety and depression can be linked to low self-esteem. Getting help for your low self-esteem can, in turn, help with anxiety and depression.
Is counselling focused on low self-esteem suitable for teenagers?
Absolutely. Therapy for teenagers can be extremely beneficial for their self-esteem. It can provide them with tools to navigate peer pressure, academic challenges, and self-image concerns which is often an issue with teens.
What are the signs of improvement in low self-esteem?
You can see progress in feeling more confident, experiencing less self-critical thoughts, being more assertive, and developing healthier relationships with yourself and others.
Do I need therapy to improve self-esteem?
Although it is possible for people to improve their self-esteem without therapy, therapy provides tailored support and tools for your unique experience, making it a more effective approach.
Is low self-esteem a mental health problem?
Low self esteem is not a mental health illness or problem in itself, however, it is often a symptom of an overall fragile sense of self and can, over time, lead to or be linked to more concrete mental health problems such as depression.
What happens in a first session?
The first session with one of our practitioners is an opportunity for you both to work out whether you feel able to work together. Your psychotherapist or psychologist will likely ask you various questions relating to what has brought you, and explain the process of therapy to you. The first session is a two-way process where you have the opportunity to ask questions and to decide whether you feel ‘safe enough’ working with your therapist.
How do I find a psychotherapist or psychologist I want to work with?
At Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy, we have two physical practices, one in Hove and one in Lewes, where we offer a full range of psychological therapies. On our website you can view each profile of our associates and contact them directly using the form on their profile page. You can also use our handy search function to find the right practitioner for your needs.
How long will it take for me to see a psychologist or psychotherapist?
We aim to respond to all enquiries within twenty-four hours. You may either contact one of our practitioners directly via their profile page, or you can contact us directly and we will assist you in finding the right person to see as soon as possible. If the practitioner you wish to see has space then an appointment can usually be arranged within a week and sometimes much sooner.
Do you offer couples or group sessions?
We offer counselling and psychotherapy for individuals, couples, families and groups. To find out about the types of session we can offer, get in touch with us today. We will find a date and time that works best for everyone involved and we will make sure everyone feels as comfortable as possible.
How can I get in touch with you?
You can contact our practitioners directly via the contact forms on their profile pages. They will then reply to you directly.
What age groups of clients do you work with?
We have psychotherapists and psychologists trained to work with most age groups from children through to adults.
Do you offer evening and/or weekend sessions?
We offer sessions every day of the week including on Saturdays and sessions are available into the evening.
What are your fees?
Our fees are set by each practitioner depending on the type of therapy. For individual psychotherapy or clinical psychology our fees range from £75 – £100 per session. For couple therapy our fees range from £85 – £100 per session.
All the content on this page has been reviewed and vetted by Sam Jahara Transactional Analysis Psychotherapist, Supervisor and Co-Founder of Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy. For any questions or more information about the subjects discussed on this page please contact us.